


Flip

by Snootiegirl



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Star Wars Setting, Dating, Emperor Palpatine dead, Friends to Lovers, Jedi families, M/M, Male Friendship, Male Slash, Pod racing, Post-clone wars, Slash, alien porn, emotional Obi-Wan, oblivious Anakin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-06
Updated: 2013-07-23
Packaged: 2017-12-10 15:08:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 22,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/787420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snootiegirl/pseuds/Snootiegirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary: AU. After the Republic wins the Clone Wars, Obi-Wan and Anakin are faced with an uncertain future. Change can be unsettling for everyone. Rated M in later chapters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title: Flip
> 
> Author: snootiegirl
> 
> Summary: AU. After the Republic wins the Clone Wars, Obi-Wan and Anakin are faced with an uncertain future. Change can be unsettling for everyone. Rated M in later chapters.
> 
> Disclaimer: All Star Wars characters are owned by Disney. I make no money off the writing of this story.
> 
> Author Note: It occurred to me in reading AO stories that Anakin never turns Obi-Wan down for sex. I began to wonder under what circumstances he might. Thanks as always go out to my good friend Temple Mistress for her valuable insight and encouragement.

Chapter 1

Four years into the Clone Wars, and the Republic was finally gaining ground. They had managed to dispatch a good portion of the financial infrastructure behind the Separatists, hobbling their efforts to keep producing more and more battle droids, weapons, and ships.

Jedi Master General Obi-Wan Kenobi was tired of war. He was tired of death and carnage and injustice. He was looking forward to the kinds of days spent peacekeeping that he had enjoyed as a Padawan with his own Master. The shroud of the Dark Side kept receding day-by-day, and he felt his connection to the Force growing.

Obi-Wan was certain that the recent destruction of the Sith portended good things for the galaxy. His own former apprentice, Anakin Skywalker had dispatched the Sith apprentice Count Dooku. And just this past week, the Council discovered, through excellent intelligence work by the GAR, that the Chancellor of the Republic was actually the Sith Lord, poised and ready to destroy the Jedi and the Republic together. Master Windu had managed to use his Vaapad lightsaber skills, which skirted the edge of the Dark Side themselves, to dispatch this powerful Sith as well.

All was well, except for some remaining pockets of Separatist resistance. Some of the more aggressive species allied with the Separatists held on to the conflict for reasons of their own--money, revenge, something to do. But with the news of the destruction of the Sith and the discovery of their hand and agenda behind the war in the first place, the Jedi were observing a great shift in the tide of war. Idealists who had joined the cause because they genuinely believed in the principles of the Federation were the ones to first start deactivating battle droids and opening comm channels.

In his rare quiet moments, Obi-Wan reflected on what his life, and the life of every Jedi, would look like after this enormous trial. The war had changed many things. It had challenged the faith of the strongest of the Order. Discoveries had been made that could not have been imagined during peaceful times. Discoveries about the nature of loyalty and valor. Discoveries about what kinds of principles truly were the most universal and binding between sentients. And discoveries about the strength of the Light Side of the Force to bind life forms together and bring about miraculous results.

The Jedi had always paid lip service to a fall to the Dark Side as being a choice. It wasn't something that an individual could be tricked into or accidentally fall into. It was choice. It was free will. And as the horror of war proved over and over to many a Jedi, dead and alive alike, it was not a choice that would come easily to anyone who had lived the life of a Jedi and fought for the Republic.

Who would choose to be a bringer of such torment to so many? Who would exchange the small joys of life for the power of death and destruction? No Jedi who had ever believed in the Order, the Code, or the Republic would willingly walk that path--no matter how far those three pillars fell.

And it was true that the Republic and even the vaunted Jedi Order were shells of what they were before the conflict swept through their very halls. Friends and rivals departed in so many ways--death, desertion, defection--that the Senate and Jedi Order literally had different faces.

But Obi-Wan had hope. He hoped for a future. With the veil of the Dark Side lifting, he could begin to see that there was Light in the future of all living things. The government would heal itself with the help of people like Bail Organa and Padme Amidala. Trade would blossom through trade routes that were unclogged by the machines of war. And ordinary people--the people who truly made up the Republic and the galaxy--would pick up their lives and continue living.

And the Jedi Order? How would it look now that the threat of the Dark Side had been met and dispatched? Obi-Wan knew as a Council member and a stalwart believer in the Code that change was on the horizon for the Order as well. And he, of all people, was glad for it. The war had changed his view of many things.

\---------

Obi-Wan Kenobi had been acting strangely.

His former Padawan noticed it right away. He should. He was the closest person to Obi-Wan, as Jedi weren't supposed to get close to anyone. The first time Anakin suspected something was out of place was when he caught his former Master smiling fondly at a refugee family they were helping board a cruiser.

The family, and several thousands of others, was being relocated after the Separatists had destroyed their city. This scene had played out across hundreds of planets, displacing millions of people, for the past several years. This was hardly the first time General Kenobi had been involved in such an evacuation.

But he took a particular interest in this family. It was comprised of three adults and six children. There was the elderly matron of the group, two adult males, and a mix of girls and boys ranging in age from pre-teens to toddlers. The two men herded the children with the experience of parents long used to the unruly nature of such a gaggle of little ones.

To Anakin's astonishment, he watched Obi-Wan chase down one of the most wayward stragglers, a five year old, and hoist the child into the air. Anakin could hear the child's laughter from his position on the other side of the queue of shuffling humanity. He watched Obi-Wan smile at the child, speak with him, and then gently touch his nose. The child's eyes almost crossed keeping a watch on the Jedi's finger circling to his face.

And then Obi-Wan threw his head back and laughed with the child. It was the single most amazing thing that Anakin had seen in four long years of war. It was the very image of joy. He too couldn't help but smile at such a scene.

But later, he took the time to reflect on it and realized that it was also the strangest thing he had ever seen during the war. Obi-Wan showing affection toward a child who was a stranger? Not even a Jedi youngling, just an ordinary child. Obi-Wan laughing with abandon? Who would have ever thought to see such a thing? Certainly not Anakin.

He had always respected and looked up to his Master, even in their most difficult times. He always strove to be the kind of Jedi that Obi-Wan could be proud to mentor. It had been a struggle for him, he didn't deny that. And it probably seemed to Obi-Wan that Anakin hadn't tried very hard most of the time. But the struggles within are the hardest to see from another's viewpoint.

And now that he had attained the rank of Jedi Knight and distinguished himself in his service during the war, Anakin felt that he had finally fulfilled a great deal of the promise that Obi-Wan had seen in him. He was able to let go of his fear. He let go of his anger. He even let go of his mother, knowing she was safely a part of the life-giving Force and no harm would ever come to her again.

Anakin shook his head to clear his mind. I was thinking about Obi-Wan, he chastised himself, not me. What was this change about? When had it happened? And what did it mean?

The young Knight fell asleep still pondering these questions for which he had no ready answers. But in the chaos of the morning, he quickly forgot about what he had seen.

\---------

'The Senate Declares an End to the Clone Wars' read the headline on every HoloNews channel, every scrolling news ticker, and every brief sent to a Senator's datapad. The galaxy let out a collective exhale.

In the sunlit halls of the Jedi Temple, Obi-Wan and Yoda made their slow way to the High Council Chamber for their daily meeting. But even Yoda couldn't control his happiness at the turn of events.

"In all my eight hundred years, never have I felt such Light, Master Obi-Wan," Yoda stated.

"Yes, Master. It is buoyant to feel the life teeming throughout the galaxy with growth and expansion," he replied, a little enigmatically even for Yoda's taste.

"Yes, growth," the GrandMaster agreed quietly.

"It's a shame, Master, that the Order cannot experience this spurt of growth on the heels of such losses during the war. Our expansion is so slow in comparison to other groups and familial structures," Obi-Wan continued.

Now he's revealing his point, thought Yoda. "You have a suggestion, Master Obi-Wan, hmmmm?" he asked as he turned to the younger man and they stopped their progression toward the rest of the Council.

Obi-Wan looked deeply into Yoda's eyes. He weighed the words that he had been turning over in his mind for months. He did have a suggestion, but he didn't know how it would be received. "Yes, Master, the war has given me many things to think about. I have seen my friends taken and watched many others lose family, friends, and comrades. And my greatest impression from these experiences has been that the emotional ties that bind sentients together are also the ones that provide the most strength in times of strife. The courage to go on; the endurance to push harder. These connections--these attachments--have made the difference in so many situations, Master--the positive difference. They have created miracles of life in the pits of death."

Obi-Wan paused to catch his breath as he became more and more animated in his speech. He didn't want to be interrupted by Yoda until he had said his piece, but the GrandMaster seemed to know that he wasn't done speaking yet and held his peace for Obi-Wan to begin again.

"Master, once Jedi were allowed to form attachments--to have families. I believe that the time has come for these connections to flourish again. If what I have seen over the past four years has convinced me of nothing else, it is that our connections to other living things are what keep us in the Light. And Jedi of all people need this extra strength to keep the Dark at bay. We are the line of defense against evil. And we should battle evil with love, with passion, with joy, and with life." Obi-Wan stopped talking and crossed his arms, tucking his hands into his sleeves. He searched Yoda's face for any reaction.

"Mmmmm," Yoda began with a soft hum. "Discuss this with the Council, we will, Master Obi-Wan." He turned and continued his way to the Council chamber.

Well, he didn't say no, thought Obi-Wan.

When they arrived in the chamber, Obi-Wan was reminded again of their losses during the war by the absence of so many Council members. The first order of business would be to solicit new members. He took his seat, and the session began.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Anakin Skywalker was in a snit. And this snit was threatening to become a full-scale snarl by the look of things.

His starfighter--the one that had seen him through countless battles--had been moved. And he couldn't find it. He didn't know where it was. It should have been in its usual slip in the Temple hangar. But it wasn't. And he was _pissed_.

"Deck officer!" he bellowed. The poor man double-timed it to the tall Jedi's side, looking askance the closer he came to the powerful young man.

"Yes, sir," he clipped efficiently if a little quietly.

"Where is my ship?" Anakin enunciated as if speaking to a youngling. His posture said everything that his words didn't. Hands on his hips, leaning just a little toward the deck officer, his body said _and who the hell authorized anyone to even look at it much less touch it or move it!?!_

The deck officer wished for death, swift and immediate. He knew the Jedi wasn't going to like the answer to his question.

"Sir, the orders came in this morning, sir. She's been decommissioned due to battle damage," he actually cringed as he was talking.

Anakin clenched his teeth and his fists. "Where is it?" he asked again as patiently as he could under the extreme circumstances.

Another voice floated through the air and took all the menace out of Skywalker's demeanor. "Anakin, you know very well that that scrap heap was overdue to be taken out of service, no matter how many little upgrades you had given it. It was dangerous to fly anymore," Obi-Wan's smooth tenor sounded more than a little indulgent and maybe just a tad amused.

When General Skywalker turned to face his former Master, the deck officer took off for cover. No sense in sticking around and risking his life over following orders, he thought.

"Master!" Anakin called back. "It's my starfighter. I'll say when it's ready for the scrap heap." He was still miffed but now there was amusement in his words too. He was pleased to see Obi-Wan.

They had been in each other's company less and less since the end of the war. Obi-Wan was embroiled in Council business almost all the time, and Anakin was overseeing the conversion of the GAR back into Republic military command instead of Jedi command. It was strange after the intensity and immediate nature of constant battle, through which they had fought side-by-side in countless engagements, to see so little of each other.

Who would have supposed that either of them would wish for a mission to the Outer Rim just to have the time together on the trip?

"And what do you need a starfighter for anyway, Anakin?" Obi-Wan asked the next logical question.

"Well," Anakin said, and he actually shuffled his feet and ran a nervous hand through his hair. "Frankly, I'm bored. I was going to just mess around with it for a few hours to decompress and get my mind off of everything else." He smiled sheepishly at Obi-Wan. He knew his former Master would understand the therapeutic value of working with machines.

"Ah," replied Obi-Wan, nodding knowledgeably. "Is there anything I can do to 'get your mind off things'?"

Anakin paused to gather his thoughts. It had been a while since Obi-Wan had asked him anything remotely personal. For years it had been sufficient just to inquire into the status of their bodies, to know that each of them was unharmed enough to make it to the next transport and medical facility. Asking if there was anything the other could do to alleviate the burden of psychological injuries was something they just didn't have time for. How peace changes things.

"Oh, you know, the usual," he hedged. There really wasn't anything 'usual' anymore.

Obi-Wan decided to withdraw the question himself. He cast his gaze around the large hangar. "Surely, there are other machines here that could use a little attention?" he suggested instead.

Anakin smiled, relieved that he didn't have to dissect his thoughts before his required mechanic therapy. "Yeah, I guess. I just hadn't thought about it because I was so mad that my baby was missing from her berth." This earned a roll of Obi-Wan's eyes.

"Force forbid that you should ever have the care of an actual baby, Anakin. I fear finding you tinkering with its insides as well." Obi-Wan was so tickled by his own tease that he barely got through it with a straight face. Anakin gave him a playful shove in the shoulder.

"Whatever," the young Knight responded. After another beat, he asked, "Dinner at Dex's tonight?" He tried not to sound too hopeful.

"I'd love to, Anakin," Obi-Wan agreed. "It would be good to catch up. Who thought we'd be split up by peace?" They both chuckled, but in an ironic and somewhat awkward way. Who indeed?

Obi-Wan then clapped a hand on Anakin's shoulder and said, "See you around 1900 hours then." With a last smile, he turned and strode back the way he had come into the hangar.

Anakin watched him go and then turned to find the deck officer again. He would know if any of the other machines needed tending.

\----------

Precisely at 1900 hours, Obi-Wan arrived at Anakin's door. He was about to open the door himself but then decided to announce his presence instead. He shook his head in silent laughter as he heard Anakin stomping around the apartment, undoubtedly cleaning something at the last second. The door swooshed open.

"Hello, Master," Anakin greeted him. His broad smile faltered a little as he took in the sight of his friend.

Obi-Wan was dressed in civilian clothing for their excursion out of the Temple. Anakin tried very hard not to look shocked. When had Obi-Wan ever of his own volition chosen to wear anything but his Jedi tunics? Anakin could only remember a few times when they had gone undercover.

He stepped back from the door and swept his arm toward the living area for Obi-Wan to enter.

Obi-Wan stepped past him and remarked, "You know, Anakin, you can call me by my name if you prefer." They had had this discussion before. Anakin claimed that it was just a habit, and he was too preoccupied by other concerns to think about changing it. Obi-Wan was content with that during the war, but now he was interested in changing old habits.

So he expressed his preference: "I would like it if you would. We are partners now, not teacher and student. There's no need for you to show so much deference anymore--not that you ever did beyond that term." He gave Anakin a warm smile that further threw the young man off balance.

"I know, Obi-Wan," Anakin pronounced carefully with a smirk. "And I'm going to try. I will." He paused before blurting out, "Why aren't you wearing your tunics?"

Obi-Wan smiled to himself. He knew that Anakin wouldn't be able to resist commenting on his attire. He looked down at himself, feigning surprise. "Well, look at that!" he exclaimed, earning an eye roll from Anakin. Obi-Wan even carried the farce on to the point of turning around and looking down the front of his pants, as if the clothing itself held the answers. By the time he faced Anakin again, the young man was laughing heartily.

"Ok, ok. Fine," Anakin acceded between gasps for air. "But I'm going to change too, so give me a minute." He walked rapidly to his room, and rummaged through his inordinately large collection of civilian clothing.

When he returned, looking just as dashing and un-Jedi as Obi-Wan, he clapped the older man on the back and said, "Let's go. I'm starved."

Obi-Wan smiled again and said, "Of course you are, Anakin." But he obeyed and moved to the door with alacrity.

Anakin was driving the speeder swiftly through the Coruscant evening before he remembered that Obi-Wan hadn't answered his question.

\------------

Dinner was a quick affair as most are in diners. Dex was pleased to see both of his friends and for once had no ill tidings of underhanded dealings to pass on to them. He laughed and guffawed with them as they ate. Anakin and Obi-Wan barely got a word in edgewise to each other.

That left the drive back to the Temple. And Anakin, for once, wasn't in a hurry.

"So what has been keeping you busy these days, Mas-uh, Obi-Wan?" he began.

Obi-Wan looked out across the landscape of Coruscant with a wistful look on his face. The sunset made his face glow, and he closed his eyes briefly to just breathe in the air and enjoy the warmth.

Finally he turned to Anakin and spoke, "Mostly Council business. Some reporting to the Senate. You know, the business of peace." He stopped talking and seemed content to leave it at that.

Anakin was not satisfied. "That's it? No missions? No off-world traveling?" He was determined to pull information out of Obi-Wan.

"Some," Obi-Wan agreed. "But nothing like the war, of course." At the mention of war, Obi-Wan's eyes suddenly looked far, far away. When he returned to himself, he playfully slapped Anakin's thigh and said, "So what has been occupying your time?"

"Well, after I was able to turn over all of my troopers and my cruiser to the Republic military, I spent a couple weeks assessing the space-worthiness of spacecraft for the Navy. They were concerned about hidden battle damage and things like that. I managed to nearly kill myself only a couple of times," he teased Obi-Wan. When he looked over at his former Master, Obi-Wan didn't even look like he was listening, which was highly unusual.

"Master? Obi-Wan?" Anakin called to him as if from a great distance.

Obi-Wan kept his eyes distant, but answered, "Do you ever think about your future, Anakin? Now that you are a Knight and the war is over, I mean?" He turned to fix Anakin with an intense gaze that made Anakin squirm.

"Future? Um, no, not really--at least I didn't used to. 'Future' to me used to always mean becoming a Jedi. Now I'm there. but what's next? I have been restless lately. I'm ashamed to admit--" he cut off. Maybe a little too ashamed he thought.

"You miss the rush of adrenaline from battle?" Obi-Wan finished his thought. He knew Anakin as well as he knew himself. The blonde Knight thrived on action and purpose. Peacekeeping had not really been Anakin's forte. Obi-Wan had tried to sublimate this knowledge of his former apprentice during wartime, but now he was worried.

Anakin blushed and nodded slightly, keeping his eyes on the skyway. He should have figured Obi-Wan would know already. But what he didn't know was how Obi-Wan would handle that knowledge.

He didn't have long to wait. "I worry, Anakin. I worry about your tendency to be an adrenaline junkie. Pod racing, flying sorties in your starfighter, leading battles in a star cruiser. I know the high is addictive, but I think you also have it in you to find your 'high' in other ways," Obi-Wan said.

Anakin was quiet for a while as he digested Obi-Wan's words. He was surprised. He had thought that Obi-Wan would trot out some old speech about controlling his emotions or some such Jedi tripe he had heard thousands of times. But genuine concern? And an expression of emotion on Obi-Wan's part? Again, he wondered what had gotten into his Master.

Obi-Wan spoke again before Anakin even opened his lips to reply. "I have been thinking about the future quite often lately myself. You might even say I'm preoccupied with it. And I'm not talking just about the future of the Order, although that does occupy a great deal of my time as well. I am speaking of my personal future. Of what I want out of my life now." He paused and started casting his eyes over the city again as if searching for something he had lost.

Anakin was pretty sure that he was coming down with a fever. Too many shocking revelations from Obi-Wan in one evening was making him feel dizzy. Emotion. Future. He and Obi-Wan had even left their lightsabers in the Temple when they went out for the evening. This was getting kooky, even for Anakin.

"Well," he said, trying to cut the tension in the air that seemed to follow every declaration Obi-Wan made. "I know that I'm having a little trouble transitioning back into non-military life. I guess I should have assumed I wasn't the only one." There, he thought. That was non-committal but relevant.

"Yes," was Obi-Wan's only reply. And they rode the rest of the way back to the Temple in silence, barely even wishing each other good night before parting.

 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

  
When Obi-Wan returned to his quarters, he felt like a deflated balloon. All the air was sucked out of him as soon as the front door shut. Although he had enjoyed his evening with Anakin, his morose attitude had spoiled most of the time they had had to really talk. He missed his best friend. He shouldn't, but he did.

And as he walked around the room, the feeling only grew. He saw little reminders of when Anakin still lived in the same quarters. The stain on the carpet that never came out. The dent in the wall. The smell in the kitchen they could never pinpoint. He smiled at all of these. At the time, they had been annoying, but now they were the stuff of memories and anecdotes. Something to share and laugh over.

Except Obi-Wan didn't have anyone to share them with.

 _Why did I have to be such a boring old man tonight_ , he wondered. _Anakin probably couldn't wait to get away from me after that speech about him and his need for action. There's nothing wrong with being an active person, after all. But for some reason, my worry for him, about him, only grows despite my best efforts to release it. Maybe I should try to meditate again._

Obi-Wan shed the loose-fitting shirt he had worn to dinner and settled into a crossed-legged position on a meditation pad. Lately, he had been having trouble when he tried to meditate. He couldn't find his center. He couldn't relax enough to reach the meditative state. And, of course, the more times it happened, the harder it became the next time he tried.

This session was no exception. His mind began to wander immediately. He thought back to a story Anakin told Dex over dinner. It was one of the funnier moments from their experience in the Clone Wars. And suddenly, Obi-Wan felt his pieces fall into place. He achieved the center he needed for meditation. He breathed deeply and let the sensation pass through him.

After several hours of communion with the Force, Obi-Wan emerged refreshed and more content than he had felt in months. He made a trip to the 'fresher and got ready for bed.

Once he was settled on his pillow, his mind started to play tricks on him--or so he thought. He could see Anakin sitting in his own quarters, watching something pointless on the HoloNet. But no, he wasn't alone. He smiled at someone and reached up to take an offered hand. Before Obi-Wan could identify who the other person was, the scene shifted, and he saw Anakin alone again.

This time, though, he was bleeding. He was hurt, and he was alone. Alone on some distant planet in the Outer Rim. And the war raged around him. Surrounded by other beings, but truly alone. Obi-Wan instinctively called out to his apprentice and startled himself awake.

The peace of his meditation was almost entirely dissipated by the memory. Because that's what it was--a memory of Anakin one of the many times he was hurt during the war. Obi-Wan had found him, of course, and he had healed. But the image of him all alone had stuck with Obi-Wan for the remainder of the conflict. And now his subconscious was replaying it again.

The first image of a happy Anakin was almost entirely forgotten in the wake of the terror of the second. It wasn't a memory that Obi-Wan could claim. Perhaps that one was just a dream, he thought. He shifted into a more comfortable position and fell back into a dreamless sleep.

\--------------

Anakin awoke in the morning feeling sluggish. He didn't have anything demanding his attention--like battle droids or perky Padawan--and he rolled over thinking he might just sleep in a little. No hurry to the day.

After a cold breakfast that was better than what they ate on the battlefield most days, but not nearly as good as what Obi-Wan could whip up, Anakin took a long, hot shower. He loitered in his bedroom in just a towel, fidgeting with a piece of droid he had found after several years of it living under his bed. Sitting on the edge of the bed, his legs still wet from the shower, he absently pushed his wet hair back from his forehead and entertained the idea of a haircut.

Make life simpler if I didn't have to wait for my hair to dry, he reasoned. But his thoughts moved on into other frequently-traveled routes. Maybe he'd look up some old Padawan friends today. Maybe teach that advanced lightsaber techniques class he had been contemplating. Or maybe he'd go to the pod races being held on one of Coruscant's moons later this afternoon. It wouldn't be nearly as large a race as they had on Tattooine, but he might enjoy it anyway.

He remained bent over his mechanical so long that his hair did dry on its own. And his back got a little stiff. Stretching up, he heard several pops along his spine. Tossing the parts and tools aside, he lay back on his bed with his hands tucked under his head. And promptly fell back to sleep.

Anakin had a dream that someone was calling his name from very far away. Only it wasn't a dream. It was Obi-Wan at the front door. He was too polite to walk around the apartment looking for Anakin even though he knew he was home. So he waited and called.

Anakin rubbed his face and squinted at the sunlight. What time is it, he wondered. The chono on his bedside table said 11:30. Force, he thought, I haven't slept this late since I was fourteen. He swung his long legs over the side of the bed and hoisted himself up.

"I'm coming!" he called back to Obi-Wan. He smacked the top of his mouth with his tongue and grimaced at the taste. With sluggish steps, he made his way to the living room.

Obi-Wan stood with his arms crossed as usual, but he had a rather big grin on his face. "I was wondering if you had heard me," he teased. He looked Anakin up and down. "Are you ill, Anakin?" Why else would he look like he just rolled out of bed at this hour? And what's with the towel?

Anakin was just remembering he was dressed only in a towel at that moment too. "Um, uh, no. I got up earlier and showered, but I must have fallen back asleep for a couple-three-hours." He chuckled at himself.

"Well, that explains the hair too," Obi-Wan observed drolly. "Come on, get dressed."

Anakin looked up at Obi-Wan with his hand midway through his unruly locks. "Why? Where are we going?" He was instantly alert after years of battle readiness.

"It's a surprise," Obi-Wan replied. "Now, get dressed. And you don't need to look like we're taking on a droid battalion. This is a fun mission."

Anakin looked skeptical. "Yeah, right," he said, but he quickly dressed and presented himself for the 'mission.' "Ok, lead the way, General," he said in a mock stern tone.

Obi-Wan couldn't resist an eyeroll. "At ease, soldier. We're heading for the pod races on Hesperidian this afternoon." He glanced casually over his shoulder to see the effect of his statement on his friend.

Anakin's eyes widened and began to glow. "Really?" he asked like a disbelieving child. "But you hate pod races," he pointed out.

"Yes, but you love them. And since I had the afternoon off, I thought we could go together," Obi-Wan explained. "I'm surprised you didn't have the plans yourself."

"Well, to be honest, I had thought about it . . ." Anakin said and jogged to take his place next to Obi-Wan as the shorter man strode purposefully toward the hangar. Anakin couldn't stop smiling. He hadn't looked forward to anything this much in a long time.

"Thanks, Obi-Wan. This is going to be great," he confidently announced. "I'll drive."

Obi-Wan didn't even muster a well-placed jibe at that. He just smiled softly and enjoyed the company.

\------------

The following day found Obi-Wan sitting through hours and hours of Council meetings. He tried to keep focused on the proceedings, but he kept daydreaming about the day before.

Anakin had glowed the entire time from leaving the Temple until they had bid each other a good evening and parted at Obi-Wan's door. The young man's voice was hoarse from the cheering, shouting, and taunting he had engaged in the entire time they were at the race. He had even gone so far as to spill his drink on himself when he leapt from his seat during one particularly hairy collision on the track.

"Idiot!" he pronounced. "I could have made that turn in my sleep when I was seven," he said as he brushed at the offending liquid and cast Obi-Wan a side-long glance. The Master had retained his seat during the commotion and was silently handing Anakin some left-over napkins he had tucked away somewhere.

Anakin accepted the proffered papers. "Thanks," he said absent-mindedly. "Did you see that?

"Yes, I did. Tragic loss."

Anakin scoffed. "Fffft, yeah, 'tragic.' The biggest tragedy is that they let those nerf herders into this race in the first place. You see that guy down there?" He pointed to one particularly horny-headed little driver. "Absolutely no business owning a pod, much less piloting one." Anakin smiled in self-satisfaction at his expert commentary.

"Well, perhaps it's a family-business kind of thing," Obi-Wan offered. He truly was out of his depth here. Now show him two feuding ethnic groups and he could read their body language like a datapad. He could pick out the aggressive members who would need pacifying from those that were deeper thinkers and would need solid arguments to be swayed. Then there were the truly wise leaders who blended into a group and were unprepossessing in the way of natural royalty or tribal clansmen. But he didn't follow the sport of pod racing, much less know anything about the intricacies of piloting the courses. He was pleased that Anakin was pleased. That was what mattered.

Anakin settled back into his seat and sipped his remaining drink. Obi-Wan continued, "Do you miss it yourself?"

Anakin looked at him, sort of startled at the question. "Um, well, nah. I got to 'pod race' enough during the war. Participating in it as a sport seems kind of silly after shooting slaloms of droids to save the lives of millions of people, you know?"

Obi-Wan nodded. "I can see that. But maybe the frivolity of it is some of its appeal."

"Oh, yeah. Just being able to prove to yourself that you can do it. But then, I've been there and done that," he grinned. Obi-Wan grinned back.

"I recall," he said. "I was thinking about that campaign over Kamino recently. The Council was discussing the future of the Clones still in incubation and training. The Senate has stopped the production of new Clones, but the Council is adamantly opposed to 'disposing' of existing individuals. Anyway, it reminded me of when we were there, and you were leading the air support." Obi-Wan paused to sip from his own drink.

"Hmm, I never thought about it," Anakin replied. "How many are there?"

Obi-Wan's brow furrowed, "How many what?"

"Clones."

"Oh!" Obi-Wan has assumed that Anakin would have been more interested in reminiscing about his war exploits than discussing the future of unknown sentients. "Well, close to fifty thousand are already in various stages of training. But, there has been some thought given to altering the training a bit to afford them more opportunities to be civilians and fit into society in different ways."

"Taxi drivers?" Anakin asked wryly.

Obi-Wan guffawed and nudged Anakin with his elbow. "Uh, no. Things like police force, fire suppression, aid workers, teachers, and the like. Civil servants that are reliable and loyal."

Anakin made a face of agreement. "Sounds good to me. Force knows there are a lot of places that are in a lot worse shape since the war." He looked back out on the pod race.

Obi-Wan was interrupted in his daydream by Mace Windu asking him a direct question.

"Obi-Wan?" Mace repeated. "What do you think?"

"Oh, uh," Obi-Wan sputtered. "I agree with your assessment, of course."

"You agree with my assessment? Well, that's good to know. However, I asked you what you would like for lunch." Mace followed this up with a good-natured smile. "Mind elsewhere today?"

Obi-Wan blushed down to the roots of his hair. "Yes, sorry, Master," he apologized, but he still couldn't help thinking that he'd rather be with Anakin than in the meeting.

"Well," replied Mace. "Perhaps we should break for lunch then. Get some air?" He stood and stretched, his posture showing he was less than altruistic in his motives for a lunch break.

"Yes, that's a fine idea," Obi-Wan agreed. The rest of the group followed suit with Mace and started moving toward the door. Obi-Wan knew just where he was going. The Gardens. He could get some exercise and clear his mind.

 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

A week after attending the pod races with Obi-Wan, Anakin felt himself becoming restless again. And since he knew from having lunch with him earlier in the day that Obi-Wan was tied up in a diplomatic dinner this evening, he was essentially on his own.

He decided to find some fun and excitement on the lower levels of Coruscant.

Anakin opted to disguise his appearance in civilian clothing, but he did conceal his lightsaber on his person just in case. He walked along the crowded walkways in front of every type of establishment for vice that one could think of--bars, casinos, sports palaces, spice dens, and sex clubs. Each one looked more unsavory than the last. Anakin tried to keep an open mind. He was after all looking for something exciting to do.

When he paused in front of a place called Parin's Pugilist Pleasures, he could hear the roar of a predominantly male crowd. Intrigued, he stepped inside the door, waving the bouncer off with the Force. The smell of sweat, blood, spice, and men hit him with a powerful punch. He staggered a little as memories were conjured by these smells.

He saw Clone troopers bleeding on distant planets. He heard the yell of pilots who were facing certain doom but still cried out through the com until they disappeared in a flash of explosion. And the smells--burning flesh, festering wounds, the fear before a battle. Anakin had to hold his head and shake it a few times to clear his vision. Luckily, the place was dark enough and crowded enough that no one paid him any mind.

When he felt less foggy, he began to survey the inside of the room. It didn't take him long to realize the reason it was so dark was because the main attraction had all the spotlights trained on it. And 'it' was a spot in the middle of the crowd marked off by no barriers other than the people who created its perimeter. It could have existed in any spot in the room, but Anakin sensed that it was always just there.

He began weaving his way through the other onlookers to get to the ring. He was taller than most of the humans, but several of the aliens towered over him too. He jostled for position until he had a clear view. Using the Force to create just a little space where no one but he could stand, he crossed his arms and observed.

The two beings in the ring were stripped of all clothing to the waist. The heat of the lights, in addition to their exertion, had sweat dripping down their skin everywhere. The one who had any hair pushed it out of his face, and Anakin could see liquid drops spray from the motion. Then he saw the blood.

The floor was nearly covered in it. He had obviously come lately to this event--or series of events. This was not the first match. Anakin had learned to judge the amount of blood spilled in an area during his time in the war. And here he judged that at least a dozen pairs had fought and bled for the appreciation of this crowd. He closed his eyes briefly against the smells and memories that threatened to overtake him again.

When he opened them again, he watched the final blow. The creature with no hair, but plenty of scales, wolloped the other guy and turned to collect his raucous applause from the eager crowd. The loser was drug away to some shadowy corner for what fate, Anakin knew not.

As soon as the ring was cleared of these two, another pair took their place. This continued unabated for the next hour as Anakin watched, studied, pondered, and slowly became intoxicated by the atmosphere. By the time he had figured out how to enter himself into the competition, he felt as electric as a power coupling and as invincible as the Chosen One.

Anakin won his first fight handily--to the disappointment of the crowd. Someone pulled him aside as the other guy was carted off to the dark.

"Hey, man," he growled. "No one's going to make any money off you if you finish them too quickly. Make it look like they've got a chance. Give the guys some time to place some bets on your opponent, and then you'll really clean up."

Anakin thought about this advice. He wasn't here to make any money. He didn't need it. What he needed was the rush of the fight. The challenge and the danger. He needed to feel alive. It was what had been missing the past few months. And now that he had it back, he wasn't about to let it go.

Anakin started to become a regular. Night after night he would fight three, sometimes four, times. Each time he drew it out a little longer, let the other guy get in a few shots. Sometimes this was a mistake if the other guy drew his blood or otherwise marked him. He didn't want to have anything visibly wrong with him for the next day at the Temple. But you can't control what happens in a fist fight.

And that's how Anakin got his nose broken.

\----------

Obi-Wan stood restlessly at Anakin's front door. He had been ringing for two minutes with no response. Is he sleeping again, he wondered. Surely he hasn't forgotten our lunch plans.

When the door opened, Obi-Wan forgot completely about lunch, about waiting, and about the box he was holding.

"Anakin!" he exclaimed. "What happened?" He reached up automatically to place his hands on either side of Anakin's face, turning him into the light for a better look. Obi-Wan could tell that the injury was fairly new, although bruising had settled into his cheeks indicating at least twenty-four hours' lapse since the nose was broken.

"Have you seen the Healers?" he asked anxiously. "What did they say?" He had not let Anakin's face go yet, and every question brought his face closer to the young man's.

Anakin began backing up into the apartment to get Obi-Wan out of the corridor. When the door finally closed behind his former Master, Anakin spoke. "It's fine. I set it."

Obi-Wan frowned. He set it himself? Why? The Master found himself hoping that Anakin's nose didn't change in appearance too much. I like his nose as it is, he thought.

They continued their strange march across the carpet, Obi-Wan unwilling to let go of Anakin's face. But when the back of Anakin's legs hit the couch, he dropped to it and out of his Master's grip. Obi-Wan felt like he didn't know what to do with his hands anymore. He sat in a chair opposite Anakin and just studied the young man.

He had on a light sleep shirt and pants, but Obi-Wan's keen eyesight picked out other signs of injury. Anakin was unconsciously cradling his ribs in a way that Obi-Wan had seen many times before. And there was more bruising and torn skin visible on his knuckles.

Obi-Wan sat back in the chair. He suddenly felt a very strong sensation. He felt . . . angry. He crossed his arms and waited to see what would happen next.

Anakin watched his Master watch him. He knew Obi-Wan was piecing it together. That was why he had avoided Obi-Wan for a few days. These past couple nights had seen some new creatures come to the fight club just to challenge him. In the end, he had prevailed, but they had challenged him more than those in the past. He had hoped to avoid seeing almost anyone until the swelling at least had gone down.

Anakin weighed the possibility of making up a story to explain the broken nose. But as Obi-Wan raked him with his all-seeing eyes, Anakin knew it was hopeless to even try. He already knew. "So . . ." Anakin began.

"Really, Anakin? Is this the only way you can think to spend your time?" Obi-Wan cut him off in more ways than one.

Instantly, Anakin was defensive. "Stay out of it, Obi-Wan. It doesn't concern you. I'm not your Padawan anymore."

"You will always be my Padawan and my responsibility, Anakin," Obi-Wan said with a quiet rage that actually spoke to Anakin more than the words did. Why did Obi-Wan care so much anyway? It wasn't like they were at war anymore. He wasn't hurting anyone else. He wasn't shirking his Jedi duty. What was the big deal?

Obi-Wan continued in his controlled tone, "This is what I was afraid of. What I tried to talk to you about. Your need for a thrill, for excitement. Couldn't you find something . . . else?" He was at a loss for what to suggest. What could keep Anakin on the straight and narrow path of self-preservation and dignity?

Anakin fought back his angry reply. Obi-Wan had never understood this part of him. His Master might be happy reading a book and sipping tea, but that wasn't Anakin. He tried the same response again, "Stay out of it. Please."

This time, Obi-Wan threw himself to his feet and turned away from the younger man. He couldn't stand to look at the painful break in the center of his face. Plus, it just made him feel helpless. He couldn't prevent this; he couldn't stop Anakin from seeking out vice. His anger ebbed as desperation and sadness took its place.

"What about me?" he asked in a whisper.

Anakin wasn't sure he had heard right. "What about you?" he asked, perplexed and irritated.

"It hurts me to see you hurt," Obi-Wan elaborated, still facing away from Anakin. He bowed his head and closed his eyes, willing away the extra moisture he felt in them. Before Anakin could answer him--because he was afraid to hear the answer--he stumbled to the front door. He quickly walked down the hallway and around the corner.

Anakin followed him as far as his front door. He spotted something on the floor and picked it up. A box of his favorite chocolates. Obi-Wan had dropped them earlier and forgotten them completely. Anakin popped one in his mouth and went back to his couch.

As he chewed, he tried not to move his nose. A difficult task, but it did allow him to focus on something other than his anger. By the time he had eaten half the box, he stopped mid-chew with the realization that Obi-Wan had demonstrated some serious emotions that evening.

He had clearly been angry. And overly concerned about a simple broken nose. And then he had expressed what? Sadness? Again, Anakin couldn't figure the why. What was wrong with his friend? He was acting so strange lately.

First there was the incident with the child. Then the dinner in civvies. The strange conversation about the future. His warning about thrill-seeking. His enthusiasm for pod racing of all things. Now, he shows up with chocolate, throws a fit, and storms out? What the kriff?

Well, my nose hurts too much to worry about this tonight, he decided. I'm staying in and watching something pointless on the HoloNet. And he settled in with the rest of his chocolate.

\--------------

"Hold still," Obi-Wan commanded as he looked closely at Anakin's bruises. He dabbed bacta on the purple splotches and frowned.

The Master had shown up the following morning armed with medical supplies and a contrite expression. "You don't need any more scars," he pronounced as an explanation for his appearance. Anakin had been too sleepy to argue. He traipsed back to his bedroom and stretched out in resignation. What difference did it matter if Obi-Wan wanted to play healer for a few minutes?

Anakin relaxed into his mattress as Obi-Wan continued his ministrations. His thoughts drifted back to when this sort of thing was a common occurrence. The war. Everything seemed to always come back to it.

Obi-Wan too was indulging in memories as he cleaned, inspected, shook his head, and determined to keep going. Anakin's body had so many reminders of the war already. Why would he want more damage? "You know," he began as he worked. "There was a time when we tried to avoid getting injured like this." His raised eyebrow fell on closed eyes. Anakin just grunted.

Rather unnecessarily, Obi-Wan ran his hands down Anakin's chest, ostensibly checking for cracked ribs, but really he was just taking his time re-connecting with Anakin in a way he used to take for granted. He didn't enjoy looking for injuries--no, that was never it. He liked the contact, the feel of someone else's skin against his. He sighed just a little. "Better?" he queried.

Anakin cracked an eyelid. "Sure," he agreed automatically. He took in Obi-Wan's posture, a little slumped but definitely thoughtful.

"I miss this," Obi-Wan confessed. He looked up to catch Anakin's gaze.

Anakin smirked. "Well, then, I'll head out again tonight . . ." he began.

Obi-Wan shook his head. "No, I don't miss you being injured. Of course not. But I miss the clarity of life that we had back then. The split-second decisions that held the conviction of righteousness. I've forgotten how to live in the shades of grey that are peace." As he spoke, he warmed to his subject. What he didn't say though was what he missed most. His missed Anakin. And it was hard to know that the young man didn't feel the same.

Anakin felt the need to fill the air with something after Obi-Wan's speech. "Um," he began and thought brilliant to himself. "Yeah, I know what you mean," he lied. He missed the rush. He missed the feeling of saving lives. He didn't deal with the complexities of moral code that Obi-Wan did on the Council--thank the Force. He really didn't need the stress.

And right now, he just wanted Obi-Wan to finish up and let him go back to sleep. He was so obvious about it that Obi-Wan didn't even need the Force insight to pack up the bacta and bandages and stand up from the side of the bed. "Sure you do," he said sarcastically although softly. Anakin rolled over away from his former Master before Obi-Wan even left the room.

Just before departing, Obi-Wan reached through the Force to test Anakin's mental shields. They were as strong as ever, with just a bit of emotion leaking out. Obi-Wan felt annoyance, impatience--all the things that usually emanated from the young man. No, he thought, nothing unusual there.

And he turned and left.

\---------------

A few nights later, Anakin knew that he needed an outlet. He had to seek out the pugilist club again, or he was going to do some serious Force-damage to the next Padawan who tried to corner him and bask in his fame. Was I that obnoxious at that age, he wondered. Then he chuckled to himself because he knew he was more. Ah, well, the folly of youth and all, he consoled himself.

He dressed in dark civilian clothing and left his lightsaber behind, as had become his habit. In all the times he had ventured to this dank establishment, he had never encountered anything he couldn't handle without it. Not like during the war.

The Clone Wars had taught Anakin that even the friendliest of strangers could immediately turn on you when it suited them. Only actions proved loyalty, not words. And not knowing the attachments that a stranger harbored--family, clan, friends--was the most dangerous position to find oneself in. The threat could be hundreds of kilometers away, but he'd never know about it before the consequences were visited on his person. Seppies threatened your dear old grandmother on the other side of the planet? Gee, I haven't heard that one before.

He shook his head to clear the encroaching thoughts. He didn't need more stress today. He needed to let off some steam. He briefly wondered where Rex was and what he was doing these days to deal with stress. Anakin had always wondered what it would have been like to have the time to train Rex to use a lightsaber. He'd never have rivaled Anakin due to his lack of Force-sensitivity, but the Jedi suspected the Clone Captain could have made up for that with inventiveness and cunning.

Anakin smiled at that thought. Perhaps he'd comm Rex tomorrow and find out where he was.

But for now, he needed to keep his head focussed on his opponents. He stood outside of the ring of light for a while sizing up the crowd and looking for new meat. He spotted one who looked likely. He was hulking, depending on his size and musculature alone probably to subdue an opponent. Anakin made it a personal guideline not to use the Force during his matches. He liked to win on his own physical merits for a change.

The match was over in mere minutes. Anakin was a vision of graceful violence. The other man barely landed a blow to the Jedi's copper skin before he was down for the count. Anakin smiled tightly, not experiencing the usual release he felt after a combatant fell. Damn it, Obi-Wan, you had to creep into my conscience, didn't you?

And just as he was condemning his former Master, there he was face-to-face with the man. Anakin flinched visibly. He had never envisioned Obi-Wan in a place like this. He didn't even like to think of his Master mingling with this crowd. Before either of them could get a word out, Anakin grasped Obi-Wan's elbow--for he was crossing his arms in disapproval of course--and led him out the doors. He was not going to have this conversation in such a place.

Standing on the walkway, facing each other, Anakin still clutching Obi-Wan's elbow, they breathed for a moment. Each man searched the face of the other, looking for answers, asking questions. The pulse of the Force between them was another heartbeat for them. But this heartbeat pumped tension, anger, frustration, and disappointment through their collective veins.

Obi-Wan didn't know what to say or do. He was angry. He knew that. But anger wasn't going to solve anything. Neither was pleading with Anakin. He knew that well enough from their encounter over Anakin's broken nose. He just didn't know how to reach the young man anymore. Who had he become over these short months? How had he changed so much?

But that thought brought Obi-Wan up short. Who was he to judge change? He himself was dealing with so much change in his personal philosophies that he was often awash in indecision and frustration too. And there was no little amount of disappointment in himself mixed in there as well. Maybe he just needed to be honest with Anakin. Maybe that was always the best route.

He rearranged his facial features, not into the passive Jedi look he had perfected, but into something that didn't say anger, nor disappointment, nor contempt. He hoped it approached something akin to understanding. He even attempted a tight smile.

Anakin was still roiling in his volatile emotions. He hadn't found the release he needed in the club, and now Obi-Wan looked like he was about to deliver the mother of all lectures about Jedi propriety or some other Sith-damned thing he couldn't be persuaded to give a shit about. He had done his duty. He had won the war, nearly single-handedly (in his own mind), and he deserved to just live a quiet life for a little while. And if that quiet life included beating the crap out of strangers on a nightly basis, who was Obi-Wan to tell him he couldn't?

But then he felt the change. He felt the Force of Obi-Wan's emotions diminish. They didn't completely disappear, but they were reined in. And not in the same way he used to do so--so entirely that it was as if Obi-Wan had never had an emotional reaction in his whole life. But they felt more like the emotions of a normal person. It was different but not an unwelcome development in Anakin's eyes. When he looked at Obi-Wan's face, he could see the difference there as well.

Finally, after several silent minutes, connected by Anakin's firm grasp on his Master's elbow, Obi-Wan reached up and clasped the younger man's elbow as well. His thumb nestled in the crook where forearm met bicep, and he caressed ever so slightly. He felt Anakin relax minutely at the gesture.

"Please don't risk yourself this way, Anakin," he said, his voice so level that even he was surprised.

"Why?" Anakin asked with very little hostility.

"Because you are important."

"Important? How? To whom? The Order?",

Obi-Wan squeezed just a little on the arm, "You are important to me."

Anakin just stood and looked at Obi-Wan.

The Master continued, looking up earnestly into the blazing blue eyes, "I understand how you are feeling. Let me help you find other ways to deal with this."

Anakin simply nodded and flicked his head toward the Temple. Obi-Wan nodded and they simultaneously released each other to walk shoulder-to-shoulder back to the massive structure they called home.

They didn't say another word. There were no words to say. Anakin walked Obi-Wan to his door this time. Before his Master could turn away and disappear through the door, Anakin quickly reached out and enveloped the smaller frame in his long arms.

He simply held Obi-Wan for a minute, not squeezing, not rocking. Stock still, except for Obi-Wan raising his arms to fold around Anakin's back as well. As if on cue, they both released at the same moment, and Obi-Wan turned to his door. It opened silently, and Anakin took the opportunity of his Master's turned back to quietly say, "We'll talk tomorrow."

And then he was gone down the corridor.

 


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Knowing Obi-Wan's entrenched habits as well as his own, Anakin presented himself at the older man's door in the morning when he knew Obi-Wan would be sitting down with his first cup of tea. He punched in the code to open the door, and observed his Master in his customary place at the table. However, the tea was absent. And Obi-Wan looked like he had not slept at all.

Anakin immediately bypassed the table and went into the kitchen to brew the tea himself. As he stood waiting for the water to boil, he leaned against the counter and studied his friend. Obi-Wan sat nearly motionless at the table--had he even gone to bed? Anakin wondered. He shook his head of unruly curls and proceeded to make a cup of tea just how he knew his Master liked it. Or at least how he used to like it. Perhaps that had changed too.

He set the cup down in front of Obi-Wan and took the seat opposite. The tired man reached automatically for the fragrant beverage and sipped thoughtfully at it. His eye remained glued to the tabletop until he set the cup back down. Then they slowly rose to Anakin's eye level.

Unused to Obi-Wan--ever the consummate host--being less than gracious, Anakin decided to dismiss this and all the other unsettling developments of the past months in favor of just plowing ahead in their talk. He was tired of the cloying nature of their relationship now.

"I know you want to understand, but I'm not sure you do," he started out the way he had planned for the past few hours, not sleeping well himself.

Obi-Wan cut him off. "Do you know what I did when I came home last night, Anakin?" he asked. When the blonde shook his head, Obi-Wan continued, "I watched a terrible HoloVid about a family who loses a child to demon possession. And I cried." The last confession was said in a whisper, but a forceful whisper.

Anakin sat back in his straight-backed chair. He really wasn't sure what to make of that. What did that have to do with his fighting?

Obi-Wan sighed, reading the confusion on Anakin's face. "You're not the only one who is experiencing withdrawal from the events of the past four years, Padawan. What we saw, what we did, changed me too. It's made me re-evaluate everything I have believed in for all of my adult life. And it's terrifying," he finished. His stare bored into Anakin.

His next words were pleading, "How do you do it?"

"Do . . . what exactly?" Anakin asked in return.

"How do you deal with these emotions? I know I want to experience them now--don't get me wrong. I'm not going back to the way things were. I can't. But this is--" Obi-Wan stopped to run an exasperated hand through his hair then leaning on his elbow and cupping his cheek.

Anakin actually smirked a little. "Officially, I don't have any emotions . . ." he began.

Now it Obi-Wan's turn to smirk. "You know all of that is changing. I am changing it. The Code is evolving. We were lucky to escape the war with the Order relatively intact," he said, his smile fading. "The Jedi need to propagate, faster than we have with our traditional methods. We need to cultivate the kind of community and kinship that comes from family units." He paused.

Obi-wan looked at his former Padawan to see his reaction to this announcement. Anakin's mouth hung open, and his jaw worked soundlessly. Jedi families? He was speechless. And to know that Obi-Wan was behind these changes? Incredible. He had changed.

"There's more," Obi-Wan continued. More? Anakin thought incredulously.

"I want the companionship that a spouse would provide. I want a family of my own. The comfort and love that could provide would be the greatest adventure and challenge of my life. And the most rewarding." He finished his tea and settled into his chair, more relaxed than he had felt in months. He had bared his soul, and he couldn't be happier to share it with the man sitting there currently trying to determine just how crazy his friend had gone.

"I suspect you want something more too, Anakin." Obi-Wan couldn't seem to stop the flood of words now that the dam had broken. "That's where this urge to fighting comes from. You're searching for something comforting and familiar. Perhaps we will eventually want the same things. . . perhaps not. But I refuse to let you go," he said with finality.

Silence descended on them. But their gaze never wavered. Finally, Anakin cleared his throat, "Where am I going?" he asked slowly, dazed by the deluge of information assaulting his brain.

"Down a path you should not. Violence is not the only way to feel alive, Anakin. There are other--challenges--in our lives, ones I don't think you've considered," Obi-Wan said deliberately.

The older Jedi reached across the table to grasp his friend's hand. "Would you consider a family of your own to be a big enough distraction to keep you from this self-destruction?"

Anakin shrugged and said, "It's nothing I've really given thought to. I didn't know I'd ever have the option to make the choice for myself." He furrowed his brow slightly as his mind tried to follow the progression of such events. A family. Children. A companion he could openly love and show affection to? It didn't sound too bad after all.

He was returned to the moment by Obi-Wan squeezing his hand. "I think you could--should--try," Obi-Wan said tenderly.

Anakin laughed at that and squeezed back. "Ok, Obi-Wan. I'll just go out and find someone to get that started for you, Master." He couldn't resist rolling his eyes. These things took time, didn't they? He had to not only know someone, but there had to be trust, love, intimacy, comfort--all things that couldn't be gained overnight.

Tightening his grip on Anakin's hand, Obi-Wan said, "Why not start right here?"

"In the Temple? Well, yeah, probably--"

"No," Obi-Wan cut him off again. "I mean, right here." And he reached out for Anakin's other hand. "We could be a family. Or the beginning of one. If you wanted. If you let us be."

Finally, realization dawned on Anakin. "You and I?" he repeated. "Why would we be a family?"

Obi-Wan took in a deep breath. "Because I love you. And I want to be with you always. I want us to spend the rest of our lives together. It's the only thing I want anymore."

Anakin was caught up trying to decide if he had heard Obi-Wan right. He narrowed his eyes slightly and continued to study his Master's face. Then he thought better of his limited human intuition and dipped into his other realm of the Force. He sought out Obi-Wan's signature and put all of his need to understand into a soft press against the other man's mental shields. He felt Obi-Wan relax and welcome him in.

And he did understand. There was the trust, love, intimacy, and comfort he had been thinking about moments before. It was already built between himself and this man who was his closest friend, his biggest champion, his most trusted confessor. And then there was something else. Something less familiar and comforting and more thrilling.

His eyes widened on his physical self as his spiritual eyes opened to the glow of Obi-Wan. He had not considered his relationship with his Master as anything more than what it already was--as all-consuming as any relationship any two Jedi had ever had. It had always been so. They had always been a blazing beacon of attachment that defied the Code. But with the war, the Council had overlooked this for the good of the Galaxy.

Now, they were officially sanctioned by the Council, not that Anakin would have let that group of out-of-touch Masters stop him from anything he wanted if he wanted it desperately. He had always known himself better than the Council pretended to. He knew that he harbored different needs than other Jedi. And that had been part of the thrill of the attachment for him.

And in light of this realization about their attachment, weren't he and Obi-Wan already a family? Didn't they share a connection that was unique and exclusive? No one had ever come between them. And Anakin's need for family that drew from his attachment to his mother was always fulfilled by Obi-Wan. He had soothed Anakin's fears, his nightmares, his anger.....

But what did he bring to Obi-Wan? What could he offer this man who was a paragon of honor and selflessness? Just what did his Master love about him, he wondered. So he asked.

"Why do you love me?"

That was not what Obi-Wan had expected to hear or to be asked. Had Anakin ever questioned why others were drawn to him? But then, their inauspicious beginning--essentially forced on one another by circumstance--had always seemed to haunt Anakin despite the intervening years and mitigating experiences.

He smiled tenderly at the younger man again. The look was full of feeling bursting out of Obi-Wan's eyes. He extracted one hand to place it against Anakin's cheek. "Because you are you, Anakin. You are my best friend, and the only person in the galaxy who I want by my side, no matter the circumstances. If I have to attend one more boring state dinner, one more excruciating excuse for a peace summit, or even one more evening alone here in my quarters without you, I'll go mad. I crave your company, Anakin."

The younger man smiled and even blushed a little. He understood craving. "And I yours, Master. I've never felt completely at home in my own apartment. But, here, now," he gestured around at their shared rooms. "This is where I call home. Our home."

They smiled warmly at each other, assuming complete understanding had been reached.

 


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

  
Anakin moved his meager belongings back into the smaller bedroom of their shared quarters. And within the week, Obi-Wan was happily surveying the mess that was Anakin on the kitchen table, all over the couch, and in the 'fresher. He never thought he would miss cleaning up after the young man.

But the very life that Anakin brought into the space with him was worth any amount of clutter or mess. The shared all of their meals again, Obi-Wan relishing the opportunities to cook for someone other than just himself. And even puttering around the apartment in the evenings, reading, tinkering with mechanical devices, or watching the HoloNet together was more fulfilling than it had ever been before. Obi-Wan, for one, did not need excitement anymore after the years of battle. If anything, he wanted quiet and maybe even a nice little boring rut for himself.

One evening, they found one of Anakin's favorite vids on the HoloNet. It was a typical action affair with very little plot and even less dialog. Obi-Wan watched out of the corner of his eye as Anakin snacked with his feet up on the low table in front of the couch. At least he doesn't have his boots on, the Master consoled himself. He looks happy though, followed on that thought.

I wonder . . .

"Would you like something to drink with that?" he offered his younger partner.

Anakin politely refrained from speaking with his mouth full and nodded, never taking his eyes off of the action. Obi-Wan walked to the kitchen and opened the bottle of wine he had been saving for a special occasion. He couldn't think of anything more special than spending time with his friend.

When he came back to the living room, he reached out to hand the wine glass to Anakin, but paused. "For Force's sake, Anakin. Don't choke on it," he chastised. He retracted the proffered glass until Anakin had swallowed at least three times. "How did you get that much chocolate popcorn into your mouth at once?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Bit-by-bit, Master," Anakin said and reached for the wine to wash down the remnants of kernels. Obi-Wan held it out of his reach.

"No, you're not going to ruin the taste of this wine by gulping it down after that," he said. "Go get yourself a glass of water first." He gestured toward the kitchen with his head.

Anakin jumped up and feinted a move to tickle his very ticklish Master. "Don't you dare!" Obi-Wan shouted with wide eyes.

"Fine," Anakin pouted. "You spoil all of my fun." He proceeded to chug down three glasses of water before returning to the couch. Obi-Wan had stretched out with his feet in Anakin's seat. He offered the blond his wine glass again.

"Move. You're in my seat," He motioned toward Obi-Wan's usurping appendages. Obi-Wan sipped his wine and looked innocently over the rim of his glass. Then he grinned and shook his head.

"I'm comfy," he replied and wriggled a little to show Anakin how comfy he was.

"Fine," Anakin huffed again. He picked up Obi-Wan's legs, scooted under them into his spot, and dropped them officiously on his lap--all while not spilling a drop of wine. With a triumphant smile, he took a gulp of the red liquid.

"Sip. Don't gulp. Did I teach you nothing?" Obi-Wan reprimanded. He was enjoying this game immensely.

Anakin, however, was done. He was back into his vid. "Oh, good," he said. "This is my favorite part!" Unthinking, his free hand fell to Obi-Wan's shins lightly. Obi-Wan enjoyed the warmth that hand conveyed through his thin leggings. Closing his eyes, he sipped his wine and concentrated on happiness.

\------------

  
Two weeks later, their first state dinner attended in tandem was a much more 'colorful' affair for Obi-Wan due to Anakin's presence. They quipped and giggled their way through the entire proceeding.

"Imagine Windu wearing that headdress," Anakin said quietly to Obi-Wan during the speeches.

"I can't imagine how that ambassador ever became renowned for his speeches when he can barely open his mouth," Obi-Wan remarked later.

Each of them tried valiantly to hide the sniggers and guffaws behind a napkin or hand. But as the night wore on, their competitive natures got the better of them. It was now a race to see who could make whom lose their composure first.

Seated side-by-side at a long reception table, Anakin surveyed the other dignitaries searching for just the right thing to remark on. When his eyes lit on the blasé face of a tall Muun who seemed to be almost asleep in his seat, he smiled to himself.

Nudging Obi-Wan discreetly with his elbow as he raised his glass of water to cover the movement of his lips, he said, "Muun at ten o'clock. Twenty credits says bright orange drool hits his dessert." He had timed his comment to coincide with Obi-Wan also taking a sip of his wine. The snort that emanated from deep within Obi-Wan's chest threatened to bring some wine with it out of his nose. He was forced into a coughing fit instead. The dignitary on the other side of him looked deeply non-plussed.

When the coughing was finally under control, Obi-Wan settled his features into quiet interest once again. He wasn't sure if he had lost the contest since his laughter had very quickly slid into coughing. He looked sidelong at Anakin and bided his time.

When the speakers were switching, an unusual quiet descended on the gathering. Obi-Wan decided it was time for payback. He carefully reached under the table toward Anakin. The young man was distracted by something else amusing down the table in the opposite direction from Obi-Wan's position. He never saw anything coming.

Obi-Wan grabbed the inside of Anakin's thigh and squeezed almost to a pinch. Anakin's yelp of surprise was so loud that everyone, even the speaker at the podium arranging his notes, turned toward the Jedi. Anakin's face turned the brightest shade of red Obi-Wan had ever seen on it. Obi-Wan kept his face neutral but concerned. He had no trace of his amusement on display.

Anakin thought quickly. He rose with a slight stumble and murmured something about a leg cramp before limping off toward the nearest 'fresher. Looking entirely sympathetic, Obi-Wan wiped his mouth politely with his cloth napkin and excused himself to check on his friend.

When he opened the door to the 'fresher seconds later, he didn't immediately see Anakin. But he could feel his irritation in the Force. Suddenly, strong arms whirled him around to face the entry door again.

"What the hell was that?" Anakin demanded with half a smile on his face and narrowed eyes. "You play dirty, Obi-Wan Kenobi," he accused.

Obi-Wan smirked back with a lilt of his head. "Indeed. I play to win."

They collapsed against each other in helpless laughter. Anakin slapped Obi-Wan's back several times in a congratulatory gesture. He had been bested, and he didn't mind at all. It was the most interesting part of the evening.

Obi-Wan took his embrace of Anakin a little more seriously, running his hands up and down the young man's strong, broad back. When Anakin started to pull away, Obi-Wan gave him one last squeeze before reluctantly letting him loose.

"Do we have to go back?" Anakin asked in a whiny tone. "I'm so bored, I'm going to start stabbing myself with my fork."

"Unfortunately, we do. But not right away. Cramps can take awhile to unclench. I didn't hurt you, did I?" Obi-Wan asked with concern. He ran his hand down Anakin's thigh where he had pinched him.

Anakin batted away the hand unconcernedly. "Nah. I was just surprised. I thought that woman across the table had somehow grown really long arms. She's been giving me fuck-me eyes all night." He rolled his fuck-me eyes. She was definitely not his type--she was too reptilian for him.

"And what would you know about 'fuck-me eyes', my Padawan?" Obi-Wan asked with an arched brow. He was intensely curious about this aspect of being Anakin Skywalker.

Anakin leaned casually back against the entry door. "Well, first of all, I get them all the time--from women and men--and it's really embarrassing most of the time. They bat their eyelashes or blink their eye membranes, lick their lips no matter how long or what color their tongues are, and try to touch me as much as possible." He shivered as he thought back on some of the less desirable attention he had had over the years.

"Take any up on the offer?" Obi-Wan pressed.

Anakin smiled shyly, looking up at his friend through lowered, flirty eyelashes of his own. "Maybe," he admitted. "But not often," he was quick to append.

Obi-Wan grunted. He had not had to deal with the issue all that often, but it hadn't been unheard of either. He, however, had never dallied with anyone who might be seen to want more than just the obvious. To Obi-Wan's mind, any political or social leverage one could gain over a Jedi did not seem worth the physical release. He had been happy with anonymous encounters with pleasure workers who had no designs on him.

He _had_ been happy with that.

Listening intently, he determined that the last speech had ended. "Let's return for the last ten minutes, and then we can slip out, ok?" He placed a hand on Anakin's shoulder to pull him away from the door.

"Lead the way, Master," Anakin replied.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Living together made scheduling their sparring sessions infinitely easier. They basically headed to the training rooms when the mood hit them. And despite Obi-Wan's assertion that he had had enough excitement during the war, he relished the opportunity to sweat with Anakin and a lightsaber in his hand.

They had years ago dispensed with training sabers. There was no point in not feeling the weight and texture of your own weapon. Sparring was training, but two opponents who had clashed thousands of times over the years weren't training so much as choreographing their interaction. Refining their give and take, their ups and downs. They were speaking a language of the physical that went beyond the limitations of mere words.

Shedding their tunics had become a matter of course over the years too. No sense in soiling perfectly good clothing when it had become somewhat scarce during campaigns. This also afforded them the opportunity to observe the minute twitches and sinewy glides of muscles usually obscured by layers of rough fabric. It used to be a way to gauge an opponent's next move, but Obi-Wan had slid into the realm of admiring as much as observing.

Their bouts had turned more physical lately as well. They threw more punches, grabbed each other's arms and wrists, and barreled into each other's torsos. Lightsabers weren't their only means of thrust and parry anymore.

"You're slipping, old man," Anakin announced one session. "I've thrown you to the floor more times today than I have this past year all tolled," he gloated.

Obi-Wan smothered a smile and tried for indignant when he replied, "All part of my strategy, Padawan."

And it was--his strategy to increase bodily contact with Anakin. For weeks, they had danced this dance inside and out of the training room. Obi-Wan was trying to be patient, but he was increasingly frustrated by Anakin's dodges. What was he trying to prove anyway?

After another few minutes, Obi-Wan went for broke and pinned the larger, sweaty body with his own. He even cheated again and used a bit of Force restraint on the larger young man. He smiled down into his face.

"Now who's slipping?" he asked. Obi-Wan settled his hips atop Anakin's and straddled them by placing his knees to the mat. Anakin struggled against his bonds to no avail. He was pinned.

"Come on, Master. Give me another chance," he pleaded as if he had been losing all afternoon.

Obi-Wan dipped his nose right into Anakin's face while his hips made a slow circle. Huskily, he replied, "You are mine."

Up to this point, Anakin had never been opposed to sexual experimentation. He had dabbled in some alien species as well as dubious gender. But he hadn't given much thought to experimenting with someone he knew as well as his Master. But in this situation, he figured he'd use whatever he could to find an advantage over the man currently teasing him mercilessly.

When Obi-Wan ran the tip of his nose down the side of Anakin's nose and nuzzled his soft cheek, Anakin nuzzled back. And when Obi-Wan became distracted by his boy's full lips, he relaxed with a sigh, and Anakin made his move.

The Force restraint lessened, and he pushed back against his captor. Obi-Wan tumbled off with a thud, and Anakin jumped up with a cry of triumph. He had defeated Obi-Wan at his own game, or so he thought.

But Obi-Wan had had enough. He sputtered from his position on the mat, "Anakin!That's no way to treat me!" He held out his hands in a helpless gesture.

Anakin took his indignation for more play-acting. "You're just upset that I out-maneuvered you. How is what I did any different from that evil little swirl of your hips that you used to try to fluster and embarrass me?"

Obi-Wan blanched. What? Is that really what Anakin thought? All of this was just a game to him? A joke? He spoke quietly with restrained emotion, "I thought we had an agreement. I thought we were supposed to take care of each other. Why won't you let me touch you?"

Anakin began to look perplexed.

Obi-Wan continued as he sat up and fixed his eyes on the floor. "Winning some contest against you was not why I did what I did. I felt close to you, lying on you intimately like that. It was instinctual to want to connect with you." He sighed with resignation and finally finished his thoughts. "I want to do it more often. I want to do more, more often. With you. If we're going to make this relationship work . . . ."

Anakin interrupted impatiently, "Isn't it already working? Why are you trying to change things?"

Obi-Wan looked hard into Anakin's face, willing the young man to listen carefully. "I want it all, Anakin. I want you body and soul--or nothing."

Half frowning, Anakin naively asked, "What more could there be?"

Obi-wan stares meaningfully at him, and said slowly, "Don't pretend to be that innocent or that stupid. You are neither."

Realization of something he had missed for the past few months finally dawned on Anakin.

"You want . . . more . . . more intimacy?" he asked just as quietly, as he knelt next to his Master.

Obi-Wan reached out to touch Anakin. The flinch he was granted further crushed his hopes. "Do you not?" Obi-Wan asked. "Have you changed your mind?" He dropped his hand and tried desperately not to feel foolish and desperate.

"I don't know," Anakin answered honestly, settling more fully on to the mat near Obi-Wan. He's not running away, thought the Jedi Master. Anakin continued, "I don't think I understood before. But I'm starting to now."

Feeling the searing possession of anger, Obi-Wan pushed himself to standing. "Well, when you decide what you want, you know how to find me," he said, the venom in his words, voice, and eyes causing another flinch from Anakin. He turned on his heel and gathered his lightsaber and discarded clothing.

"Master, wait--" Anakin called in vain. He watched the greatest man he had ever known reduced to storming out of the room, hurt and angry, because he, Anakin, had been so obtuse not to even try to understand the other man's needs.

I'm lucky he even wants me around much less wants to elevate me to the status that no one has ever had with him before, he thought. Why am I so oblivious?

  
\------------

  
Later that evening, Obi-Wan heard his commlink buzz to tell him he had a recorded message. He flipped the switch to activate it. It was voice only.

Obi-Wan. I'm going off-planet for a few days to do some thinking. We could both use some space. I'm not angry or upset, although I know that you are both of those, and its all my fault. I'm very sorry that I've hurt you with my thoughtless behavior. You and I both need me to clarify my intentions toward you and toward us. I didn't realize the full extent of this commitment when I made it--I want to ensure that I'm equal to it before I involve you again. Take care of yourself while I'm gone. I'll be in touch.

Obi-Wan closed the link with a thoughtful expression. Was he willing to wait for the young man? He had really invested himself in this personal endeavor--not knowing what he was doing exactly. Now he felt angry, confused, rejected, and embarrassed all at the same time. It was very overwhelming for someone not used to feeling anything.

Perhaps it was foolish of him to try to establish this kind of relationship with someone as mercurial as Anakin. Perhaps he should have been happy with the way things were already. Perhaps he was asking too much--more than Anakin had to give anyone.

Stop, he chided himself. I will not sit here and blame myself for this turn of events. I was honest from the beginning. Just because I didn't drag him into my bedroom and say 'fuck me now' doesn't mean I wasn't clear. Dammit, Anakin.

Obi-Wan had a feeling he was going to need more wine. Donning his cloak, he headed out the door.

 


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

  
Meanwhile, Anakin was piloting his new starfighter (upgraded to the point that his tantrum over the old one was rendered even more childish) among the stars he had dreamed of visiting as a child. He had seen too many of them during his time in the war. He had contributed to the destruction of too many of them.

The first night, he settled into a dark bar and nursed a glass of dubiously-fermented ale. Sitting in a corner with his back to the dirty wall, he observed the courtship rituals of the creatures who frequented the place.

Watching strangers troll for a sex partner for the evening reminded him just how lucky he was to have someone like Obi-Wan who was willing to put up with him in so many ways. Searching his feelings for the answers he needed before returning home, he began questioning himself.

_Am I afraid? When is Anakin Skywalker ever afraid? When he feels helpless to protect those who are important to him. And that's what I'd be afraid of--not being able to protect Obi-Wan from me._

_I'm afraid that I can't make him happy. Then I could lose him as surely as if I rejected him out-of-hand yesterday. I'm afraid that he'll get tired of me and leave me. I'm afraid of loving too much and driving him away._

_But then, he knows me. He knows what I'm like. And he still proposed that we give it a try. He's not afraid. Maybe that should be enough for me._

The following night, Anakin decided to sequester himself away from prying eyes and intrusive interruptions. He found a room for the evening, ordered in food and drink, and flipped on the HoloNet. Away from the Temple, he had access to the 'adult channels'. He decided to experiment a little to address his second concern.

_Am I repulsed by Obi-Wan and the thought of intimacy? Actually, I'm astonished that I never considered it myself before. Is not like Obi-Wan's hard on the eyes. He has that swagger. And that hair that falls into his eyes all the time. So endearing. And I sometimes wonder how far down his freckles go . . ._

He found some pornographic vids to watch and settled in to see what tickled his fancy.

_I've never been hesitant to seek out Obi-Wan's touch nor to feel comforted by it. I've never felt that it was inappropriate or awkward. He's my friend, my mentor. This could be a chance to enjoy new aspects of that treasured body as well as his mind and spirit._

_And truthfully, it's been years since I began to worship his body as a vessel of the Force and as a warrior. I always admire his physicality when we spar. The first time he demonstrated Soresu to me with a real lightsaber, I was in awe of how he moved. I never thought I'd be able to match him. Perhaps now I have met my match._

Anakin spent the rest of the evening flipping through the different offerings for heterosexuals, homosexuals, and every other combination in the galaxy. He had to admit that he would probably rather just be home with Obi-Wan, lying on the couch and sharing some wine.

The next day, Anakin found himself piloting on auto-Anakin. His mind wandered to his last qualm.

_Am I unsure? How can I be? Of course, this feels new and unexpected, but the signs were all there. Obi-Wan made his intentions clear without pressuring me. I was the one sending unclear and unfair, mixed signals to him. I'll be lucky if he gives me another chance._

_Will I ask for one?_

Closing his eyes, Anakin allowed himself to picture his potential future with Obi-Wan. That was when he felt the thrill. The one Obi-Wan had been talking about. The one he knew Anakin needed, and he offered to provide. There was also the challenge, the unknown territory, and the excitement. A smile crept across his face, and he finally knew his own mind. Without even opening his eyes, he headed his ship toward Coruscant and home.

 

  
\------------

The young Jedi decided that a surprise homecoming might be more fun. He commed ahead to the Temple hangar to ask if Master Kenobi's speeder was docked. He was informed that Master Kenobi had left for the Senate building early that morning and was not expected to return until nightfall. Anakin was thrilled.

He spent the rest of the afternoon arranging a cozy dinner for the two of them, complete with food he did not cook himself. He lit candles and changed into more flattering civilian clothing. He had the wine on stand-by and was all set for his Master when he returned after a long day of boring meetings with imperious Senators.

Obi-Wan swept into the room and stopped short. The first thing he noticed was the dim lighting. Then the smell of food. Finally, he saw Anakin standing off to the side of the room holding two glasses of wine. Anakin offered him a small smile and a glass.

The Jedi Master wasn't sure that he was in any shape for this encounter. He was tired. He was irritated. He didn't want to do any more talking today. His mouth and throat were dry and raspy from all the words he had had to deliver that day. His head felt heavy, and his feet hurt. All in all, he felt crappy.

But he did accept the glass of wine and gave Anakin his cloak to hang up. He stood watching the younger man walk back to the door and hang the cloak on a hook. It was then he noticed that Anakin was dressed comfortably, and he yearned to be so as well. Taking a sip of his wine, he placed it on the table and held up one finger in a gesture for patience. He disappeared into his bedroom for a minute or two and re-emerged attired similarly to his friend. Both had bare feet.

He felt considerably better.

He waited for Anakin to speak first since he was the author of all the atmosphere in the room. Anakin smiled and moved forward to take his friend's hand. When they moved close enough to the table, Anakin put his own wineglass down to lift Obi-Wan's and offer it to him again. Obi-Wan accepted it graciously with a small tilt of his head.

Anakin then offered a toast, saying softly, "To us." They touched the delicate glass together, making the faintest ring. It was then that Obi-Wan noticed the soft music in addition to the candlelight and food. Anakin had apparently put some effort into this evening. But the Master continued to say nothing and nurse his tired throat. Besides, he thought, I've already said what I want. It's his turn now.

"Let's eat," Anakin suggested, sweeping one hand toward the set table. Obi-Wan nodded in agreement. They took their usual places and Anakin dished out the delicious and still steaming hot food. Obi-Wan noted that most of it was comprised of his favorite delicacies. They continued in companionable silence, Obi-Wan wondering what was next on the itinerary for the evening.

He didn't have long to wait after the last forkful was eaten. Anakin cleared the table and reappeared at the kitchen doorway with soft eyes. Finally, he found his voice.

"Thank you for giving me the past couple days. I hope that this evening is as much a gift to you as the time to think was a gift for me. I know you must think I'm the most self-absorbed creature in the galaxy." He was rewarded with a purse of Obi-Wan's lips and the lifted eyebrow, but he continued in the same tone unabated. "But the more I thought about us, the more I realized that I already knew what I wanted. I just needed you to make me externalize it. As usual, you know me better than I do, Master."

He paused for effect. Then he added, "I want you. I want us. All of us--mind, soul, and body."

 


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

  
"Well, doesn't that sound familiar," Obi-Wan sneered. "And just why do you think you deserve me after what you did? After how you made me feel?"

Anakin was surprised at the venom in Obi-Wan's voice--not because he didn't think he deserved it--because it was so unlike his former Master.

Obi-Wan didn't let him respond. He stood up from the table and threw his napkin on the floor. "You've been gone for three days with no word but a recorded message. Then one meal. One little speech. And all is forgiven?" He pointed a finger accusingly at the younger man. "That might have worked for you to apologize for losing your lightsaber again, or for disobeying orders, but these are my emotions you are toying with, Anakin! I would never have dismissed your feelings like you did mine." He crossed his arms and glared at Anakin, daring him to refute the accusation.

Which Anakin did, of course.

He made a sound of utter disbelief before spitting out, "Are you fucking kidding me? You disregarded my feelings for years, Obi-Wan!" His voiced screeched on the word 'years.' "You made me feel inadequate and weak for having them! And now that you've changed your tune, I'm supposed to just forget all that you drilled into me for a decade? Everything I tried to do to please you?" He was seething with remembered slights.

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes. "I hardly think that my duties as a Master to you qualify as emotional rejection--" he began, but Anakin cut him off.

"Oh, yeah? Tell that to a ten-year old who just left the only person who ever loved him for some stranger who didn't even want him. Tell that to someone who just witnessed the death of his mother. Tell that to me, Obi-Wan! Tell me how you didn't reject me time and again!" Anakin's anger was beginning to shake the room. But Obi-Wan refused to be intimidated even by Anakin's power.

"It was not the same," Obi-Wan ground out.

"No," Anakin agreed. "It was worse."

They stared at each other, the air between them crackling with tension. This wasn't how I thought this evening would go, Anakin thought. Why is he being so stubborn? He began to prowl around Obi-Wan as he turned their argument over in his mind. Obi-Wan was actually drumming a frustrated toe on the carpet.

So Anakin hadn't understood that they were a couple. Or that they were supposed to be. Just because they were spending time together, eating their meals together, living together, playing together. Just because Obi-Wan bought him things and took him out places he wanted to go, touched him lovingly . . . oh, wait.

Anakin realized that the difference was that Obi-Wan had offered his emotions freely to Anakin. And he had thought that Anakin accepted that stewardship. That they were dating.

In all the years that Obi-Wan was Anakin's Master, he had made no such promises to his Padawan. Anakin was old enough to understand the Code when he was taken to the Temple. He knew he shouldn't expect Obi-Wan to be a father to him, or even a friend really. Just a teacher, a mentor. Nothing more was implied or granted.

He suddenly understood the import of his actions. He realized that he had been not only a fool but a cad. He had hurt Obi-Wan deeply because of his thoughtlessness, his infantile selfishness. He was also beginning to think that he willfully ignored the signs. His blissful ignorance was born out of his desire to resist even more unsettling change coming into his life.

He had stopped his prowling, pulling up short with his thoughts. He slumped his shoulders in shame. "I'm an idiot," he pronounced.

"Indeed," was the response, rekindling Anakin's anger a little.

Turning to Obi-Wan, he growled and leaned forward fractionally. His contrite stance was completely forgotten. Obi-Wan dropped his arms from his chest at the unexpected sound, and Anakin caught him in a crushing embrace as he hurtled them both back against the wall.

"Well, then I guess you have your work cut out for you, my teacher," Anakin said darkly as he pinned Obi-Wan with his hips, abdomen, and chest. His posture dared his Master to take what he had wanted for so long.

Now it was Obi-Wan's turn for aggression. "First lesson?" he snarled. "Those who apologize should be supplicants. They should prostrate themselves." Then he placed his hands on Anakin's shoulders and pushed the young man roughly to his knees.

"Now you will pleasure me, until I forgive you," Obi-Wan said, his voice dark and domineering. Anakin's eyes floated up the length of Obi-Wan's body, catching his Master's gaze with defiant blue eyes. There was a twinge of humor at the corners of Obi-Wan's eyes. Anakin realized he was being asked to play along.

Leaning into Obi-Wan's body, he lifted his hands slowly to the waist of the older man's pants. Pausing for effect, he proceeded to rip the material away from the skin his mouth salivated for. The sound of the fabric tearing was loud to his ears, and he smiled slyly. Obi-Wan wouldn't like having his clothing treated with such disrespect, but Anakin had a feeling he could make that up to him too.

His nose dove into Obi-Wan's lower abdomen. His plump lips pulled at the taut skin, his tongue slicking the little hairs, and his teeth nipping his defiance. His hands slid down across Obi-Wan's hips and divested the Jedi of his pants, revealing his arousal at their verbal sparring.

Anakin wasted no time grasping Obi-Wan. The Jedi Master groaned quietly and leaned his head back against the wall. He hadn't had anyone in so long. He felt ready to burst at this simple touch of his sensitive flesh. But then the rough movement of Anakin's calloused hand upped the ante even more.

"Nnnnn-uuuu-nnnn-gggg-hhh," he moaned. His hands lifted to Anakin's curls and gripped them tightly. "More," he commanded with authority, pulling his former apprentice's head toward his groin. Anakin licked his lips in anticipation.

The young man's warm breath on his cock caused a shudder to race up Obi-Wan's spine. Then the heat was everywhere. His own body temperature rose to mirror the inferno of Anakin's mouth on his erection. Consumed by the younger man, Obi-Wan rocked his hips to meet the exacting rhythm Anakin set. His sweat beaded on his upper lip.

Not as inexperienced as he would admit to, Anakin used his tongue to lave the bottom of Obi-Wan's erection as he moved up and down the silky organ. He swallowed around the tip of Obi-Wan with it tucked into his throat. And then he was swallowing repeatedly as Obi-Wan filled him with his release. Semen leaked out the corner of Anakin's mouth, frothed by their frantic motion.

When he began to soften, Anakin released Obi-Wan and wiped at his mouth with the back of his hand. He remained on his knees until bidden to rise. Obi-Wan reached down to roughly grip Anakin's chin, wiping his mouth with the pad of his thumb. Warmth radiated from his eyes.

But the game continued. "Not bad," he allowed. Anakin's lips pursed. "But now, you will scream for my forgiveness," Obi-Wan said with deliberate accent. "Up. To the bedroom." He flicked his head toward his own room before stepping out of his pants and over Anakin, leaving the young man to gather himself and follow.

Obi-Wan removed his shirt, laid down on the bed, and propped his head up on his hand, facing Anakin who stood uncertainly in the middle of the room. He was unused to Obi-Wan being quite so forceful--even in play. And he wasn't sure the older man was actually going to forgive him. This might be a one-time shot, not the beginning of something.

Obi-Wan appraised his fully-clothed apprentice. "Strip," he said lazily. Anakin lifted his shirt over his head and threw it to the floor. Then he grasped the waistband of his pants, pulled the closure open, and dropped them to the floor. Kicking them away, he stood with his hands on his hips, feet planted apart, still clinging to the last vestiges of his anger to keep him from worrying.

But his arousal betrayed him. His half-hard cock grew out of the thatch of coarse blond curls, just above eye level for Obi-Wan. The Master reached out a hand to ghost over the soft skin there. Anakin's eyes closed in pleasure. But the touch stopped as abruptly as it had begun. He opened his eyes to find Obi-Wan standing next to him.

Obi-Wan pointed to the bed. "Lie on your back," he ordered. As Anakin complied, Obi-Wan walked to the bedside table for a bottle of oil. He looked thoughtfully at it before saying, "You know, I bought this for us a few months ago. I wanted to be prepared, to make things comfortable for both of us. But now," he paused, looked at Anakin, and set the bottle back down on the table, "I'm not sure I want to. . . . coddle you, Padawan." His eyes held steel tinged with hurt.

Anakin decided to try begging. "Please, Master, let me do it for you. There's no need for you to work so hard. You could watch me," he suggested hopefully, smiling gently at Obi-Wan. The eyes of the man standing over him flared with heat. He picked the bottle back up and tossed it to Anakin.

"So do it," he said quietly, enjoying Anakin's deference.

Rising to his knees on the bed, Anakin unstoppered the bottle that was the same shade of blue as his eyes. That's what had tempted Obi-Wan the most when he bought it. It reminded him of Anakin so much. Now that man was pouring the viscous liquid onto his thick, though dextrous, fingers. His eyes never left Obi-Wan's. The smile he was rewarded with assured him the game was for mutual pleasure, even if it was unspoken.

Rubbing his hands together, he began with his lower abdomen, making circles with his palms. Unconsciously, he began rolling his hips as well. Obi-Wan watched with his arms crossed, his cock twitching ever so slightly with his heartbeat. Next, Anakin reached down and grasped his own neglected cock.

But he didn't linger there.

His inner thighs were coated before he leaned back onto one elbow, revealing himself to his lover. Obi-Wan's eyebrows shot halfway up his forehead creating an approving look. His eyes followed Anakin's fingers' every move.

Watching Obi-Wan closely, Anakin pressed a forefinger quickly into his anus up to the second knuckle. Obi-Wan swayed just a touch.

"Master, want you inside me," Anakin whispered hoarsely. "Make me scream. Make me understand your desires." The invitation did not fall on deaf ears.

Obi-Wan batted away Anakin's hand from his entrance. He grasped the young man by the shoulders and realigned him up the bed. Then he sat himself on his own knees between the long, lean thighs, resting Anakin's legs on his own. He called the bottle to himself and slicked his length.

Then positioning himself, he sought out Anakin's eyes again, "Now you will know pleasure . . . and pain. But one will last, and one will become a memory. All of our pain will become distant memories." And he thrust himself into Anakin's tight body in one strong, insistent stroke.

Anakin called out for both reasons. He felt fuller than he ever had, tighter than he had a right to be. He took a deep breath and let it out. There, his muscles relaxed a little. Obi-Wan was watching his reaction. He steeled his face and said, "Fuck me, Obi-Wan." It was not a plea. It was not a request. It was a command, one General to another.

Obi-Wan began pounding into the firm globes of Anakin's ass, moving their bodies up the bed with each thrust. Their pace matched and increased. They clawed at one another, desperate to feel like one body joined by the living Force. The bed slammed against the wall, but no one paid heed. Little scratches opened on their skin. Bite marks appeared. Still they moved--punishment and forgiveness all in one act.

Finally Obi-Wan found a voice, "You are--oomph. . . . forgiven!" And he fell forward onto Anakin's torso reaching out to his lips for a searing kiss--their first of the evening. He raised his head to look Anakin in the eyes again and said with a smirk, "But you better not try any more of your shit." He continued to pound into Anakin as a genuine smile spread across his face.

Anakin couldn't help smiling back. He put a hand behind Obi-Wan's neck and pulled him into another hot, wet, messy kiss. When he released Obi-Wan's swollen lips, he replied, "Like this, love?"

Suddenly, Obi-Wan was on his back and Anakin was riding him. Both men groaned and clutched at each other. Their climaxes began to tighten their scrotums and pool in their groins. Anakin writhed on Obi-Wan's cock, milking him with his strength. The sight of Anakin's pleasure was his Master's final threshold. He held tightly to the circling hips and thrust upward until he saw stars.

Obi-Wan was barely aware of Anakin screaming his name.

But he was aware of the weight on his chest impeding his already labored breathing. Urging Anakin to his side, he slid from the young body with regret but hope. There would be more times, he promised himself.

The sound of their panting filled the room. Neither knew what to say next. Perhaps nothing needed saying. Their hands sought each other out and tightened fingers around the others'. Their legs entangled. They were silent until morning.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Morning broke over their naked bodies, even further entwined while they slept. Obi-Wan roused first and opened his eyes. He slowly remembered the previous evening--the fight, the sex. He turned his head slowly and cautiously to look on Anakin's sleeping form.

Everything he had wanted. He had it here, in his arms, in his bed. He was content.

He brushed some stray wisps off of Anakin's forehead to better study his relaxed visage. Murmuring quietly, Anakin began to stir.

"Morning, love," Obi-Wan whispered in his ear. Anakin's smile broke radiant across his face before he even opened his eyes. His lips sought out Obi-Wan's for a long, lingering kiss.

Finally, the blue of those eyes was visible in the light-filled room. Obi-Wan sighed. His partner was so beautiful. He was a lucky man indeed.

Anakin was thinking the same things--beautiful, lucky, love. "I can't believe I almost lost this," he confessed, leaning in for another kiss. When he pulled back to look Obi-Wan in the face and toy with his bangs falling over his green eyes, he added, "I almost lost what I didn't know was the very thing I wanted most of all. Us."

Obi-Wan's eyes sparkled as he felt the heat radiating off of Anakin. "No, you didn't. You just had to work a little harder for the thrill of a lifetime." His sly smile turned into a laugh for both of them.

When they quieted, Obi-Wan asked his burning question, "What made you change your mind?"

Anakin nuzzled into Obi-Wan's hair and replied, "I didn't change my mind--I listened to my heart." He paused to kiss along Obi-Wan's hairline to his jaw. "We're all adjusting to a different galaxy. Some of us are just slower to see our true paths. Thank you for waiting for me to catch up." He smiled into his lover's eyes.

Obi-Wan kissed him gently and said, "It was my pleasure."

"It will be," smirked Anakin, and kissed the tip of his Master's nose. Then he sobered with a sigh, "I knew that I couldn't stop change, but I was resisting it."

"I know," Obi-Wan replied with empathy. "It's frightening to step into a new arena like this--changes in the Order, changes in the galaxy. All this feeling is just so emotional!" Obi-Wan chuckled and trailed a finger down Anakin's chest.

"But, as you have always been, my Master, you are my guiding light. You brought me around--" he hugged Obi-Wan tightly enough to make the man grunt, "And thank the Force for that."

"Anakin. Oxygen," Obi-Wan managed to gasp out. They shared another laugh.

As Obi-Wan snuggled into Anakin's warm embrace, he became aware of a growing development between them. He looked up at Anakin, eyes sparkling, and said, "Well, may I help you with that, Padawan?" He tilted his hips to indicate his meaning.

"Fuck me, Obi-Wan Kenobi! You're my only hope," Anakin replied cheekily.

"You're hope-less, Anakin!" he laughed into Anakin's mouth. He let out a moan of pleasure as their groins came into alignment, his own cock responding to Anakin's. "But I can try," he reasoned.

This time, Obi-Wan took his time exploring the endless canvas of smooth skin that covered Anakin from head to toe. He found sensitive spots and ticklish spots, scars and birth marks. He mapped the planes of his lover's chest and flat abdomen. He breathed exclusively Anakin for minutes on end, feeling the younger man wriggling under his lips and fingertips.

They made love face-to-face and heart-to-heart, finding a rhythm that matched the pulsing of their blood. And then they talked. They shared and dreamed.

"So is this all there is to this family? Mind-blowing sex?" Anakin asked as he played with Obi-Wan's tousled bangs again. They were sated--for now--but not exhausted. Obi-Wan was pillowed on Anakin's shoulder, their bodies purposely entwined as much now as they had been unconsciously overnight.

Obi-Wan guffawed. "For now," he agreed. "But I do want more." His eyes flicked up to Anakin to check his reaction, and the younger Jedi's face was all eager anticipation. He continued, "I was thinking we could either move out of the Temple or at least request a bigger apartment--if any exist. Make it more a home than a stopping point between missions."

"And what about missions?" Anakin inquired. "Will we still be sent separately for months on end?" He tightened his grip on Obi-Wan. "Because I'd miss you if we were."

Obi-Wan nodded, "Well, that's something the Council has been discussing. We'll have to adjust our duties to accommodate family commitments now. Just like any other organization that wishes to be 'family friendly.'"

Anakin raised his eyebrows, showing his surprise. "You've been busy, my love. Getting the Council to put the needs of Jedi above those of the Republic. Astonishing really."

Obi-Wan knew that Anakin had never begrudged his duty but also had not liked the Council's insistence of putting the Republic above everything else. Forcing Jedi to lead war campaigns had been a final straw for both the lovers and the Council. They had been pushed too far from their own ideals and tenets.

"And?" Anakin prompted him again.

Obi-Wan lifted his head, "And what?"

"Well, if memory serves, you said something about kids? Our kids?" Anakin goaded with a mischievous smile.

Obi-Wan rolled toward Anakin and rested his chin on his broad chest. "I did. You've got me." He paused and drew nervous circles on Anakin's skin. "Would you like to have some?" he asked tentatively.

Anakin rubbed Obi-Wan's shoulders. "There's only one small problem I see with them. You and I can't reproduce. So that leaves us with adoption?" He didn't seem unhappy at the prospect. Force knew there were a lot of orphans from the war.

Obi-Wan had thought the same thing. "Yes, especially Force-sensitive children who need guidance." Anakin's face suddenly became a little clouded. "Not to necessarily become Jedi, love. They would be our children, not our Padawan." Anakin relaxed.

"However," Obi-Wan continued. "We do know some rather talented geneticists who could help us with our handicap of both being male . . . " he trailed off, allowing the implications to sink in.

Anakin squeezed his arms together gently and then harder and harder as he began to imagine a little blond child with Obi-Wan's freckles running into the room shouting "Daddy! Daddy!"

"I would love that, Daddy-Wan," he whispered, keeping his voice low to avoid dispelling the magical image. He leaned up for a kiss to seal the deal. "I love you," he said tenderly.

"And I love you, Anakin," Obi-Wan responded.

 


	11. Epilogue

Epilogue

  
"Tell me the story again, Daddy!" the little girl squealed as she curled up in Anakin's lap.

"Yeah, Dad, our favorite one," a calm boy of ten standard years encouraged.

Anakin exchanged looks with Obi-Wan over the bonfire they had built on the beach. The Kenobi-Skywalker family was on its annual vacation, enjoying the warm summer breezes and the sound of the waves on the shore.

When three more voices joined the chorus of requests, one of them sounding suspiciously like Obi-Wan's voice, he relented. "Okay, okay! Everyone ready?" He looked around the circle of beloved faces. I'm a very lucky man, he thought.

He cleared his throat and began the tale. "A long time ago, the galaxy was very different. Papa and Daddy were warriors. We weren't allowed to love or have families, but Papa changed all of that." He smiled at Obi-Wan over the little heads between them. "And one by one, you each came into our lives, changing us forever." He paused for dramatic effect. "And thank the Force too because Papa had all these feelings he didn't know what to do with!" He laughed at his own joke and earned a smirk from Obi-Wan.

"Stick to the official story there, Daddy," Obi-Wan chided, amusement suffusing his gentle face as he rocked a small, tired body in his arms.

The eager little faces swung back to Anakin, and the tale continued. Love, change, family, and happiness. It was the story of them, even if the roles became a little flipped between who had 'too many feelings.'

  
The end.

 


	12. Bonus Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When I originally wrote this story, I thought that the first time Anakin and Obi-Wan were intimate should be slow and sensual. However, some good advice from my reviewer TempleMistress showed me that the pacing didn't gel with the rest of the story. Therefore, I rewrote it to it's present state in Chapter 9.
> 
> But then I had 3,000+ words of a scene that went with the emotional tenor of this story. So I present it here as an alternate take on how that dinner-date might have ended. What the hey, there can never be too much love in the AO universe. ;) Enjoy!

With the cessation of his words, he began to speak with his actions. He moved forward, took Obi-Wan's hand, and pulled the shorter man from his seat. Then he wrapped his long arms tightly around Obi-Wan's torso, Obi-Wan's hands resting on the younger man's triceps. When their faces came together, he tilted his head slightly to the right and sought permission with his eyes. He still wasn't sure that Obi-Wan was granting him that second chance. He hadn't said a word all evening.

Obi-Wan studied Anakin's eyes. He searched them for the sincerity he needed. He wouldn't give Anakin another chance to back out and ask for more time. He might be new to this relationship thing, but he was pretty sure that he'd be a fool to keep pursuing someone who was uninterested. He so wanted to believe Anakin's words. When he parted his lips to finally speak, he was stopped by Anakin's lips.

He gently pressed his half-parted lips into the corner of Obi-Wan's mouth. He lingered, soaking in the smells and tastes. Both men kept their eyes open and connected, feeling the growing aura of arousal building between them. Obi-Wan moved his lips slightly as well, testing. His arms moved around Anakin's shoulders seemingly of their own will. But he knew that he had no desire to let Anakin go now that they were locked in this embrace.

They continued with the secure hold on each other's bodies and the feather light brush of lips. There was no hurry. No reason not to savor each and every second of these first moments. The slowness of their actions belied the speed of their thoughts in any case. Their minds swirled with the implications and possibilities of this newness. And all the while, their lips pulsed and caressed, fractionally parting more with each motion.

When Obi-Wan finally ventured to touch his tongue to Anakin's full bottom lip, he couldn't help the moan that escaped with it. And Anakin could never be blamed for the effect both the action and the sound had on him. He responded in kind with the tip of his own tongue, treasuring the silky texture, as he deepened the kiss even more. His hands began to kneed down Obi-Wan's back, just as Obi-Wan's hand sunk into Anakin's mop of irresistible curls.

It was Anakin's turn to moan as Obi-Wan massaged his scalp. He felt like his knees were gong to buckle with the onslaught of sensations. How had he ever doubted that he wanted to experience this? What a fool he had been. Thank the Force that his Master was a patient man.

Dropping his hands lower, Anakin again thanked the unseen Force for the thin material of Obi-Wan's shirt. He could feel the movement of the older man's muscles as Obi-Wan lifted his arms to begin to explore the tall, strong body before him. Still unhurried, there was a change in their pace where all hesitation had been shed. They would no longer wait to ask permission of the other. They had all the permission they needed to seek and give pleasure.

Obi-Wan dropped a hand to Anakin's waist and began tugging at the hem of his shirt, freeing it from his trousers. When there was enough room, he slid his hand along the soft skin to the small of his back. He softly ran his fingertips through the light hair covering the base of the younger man's spine. Anakin shivered in response and lifted a hand to begin unbuttoning Obi-Wan's shirt.

His Master's chest incrementally revealed to him, Anakin broke their kiss to see. And then he felt the need to kiss the skin down Obi-Wan's neck, over his collar bones, and down his chest. When his hand finished with the buttons, it skated back up Obi-Wan's stomach to brush lightly against a nipple. Obi-Wan stiffened in response and let out a half-stifled grunt. The hands in Anakin's hair suddenly tightened and pulled a little.

Looking up at his Master, Anakin took ahold of his own shirt and ripped it open. He wanted to feel Obi-Wan's chest against his own. Then kissing his way back up to Obi-Wan's mouth, they fell into their deepest kiss yet, chest to chest. Their hands scrabbled on each other's backs and in each other's hair, trying to find the perfect grasp.

Exploring in this deliberate way was so fulfilling. Obi-Wan felt like his heart was going to burst with the emotion that he had been building. He had imagined this so many times, but it exceeded all expectations when all five of his senses--not to mention the Force dancing around them--were filled up with Anakin. Always a thinker, he knew that he needed to get out of his head and stop trying to analyze instead of immersing himself in sensation.

For all of his embrace of emotion all of his life, Anakin too was drowning a little in his feelings. He alternated between elation and trepidation, between aggression and passivity. His enjoyment of their touching and kissing outstripped it all though. Deliberately trying to shut down his thinking in favor of just reveling in the moment physically, he tilted his hips toward Obi-Wan.

When Obi-Wan moved his lips down Anakin's neck, the younger man took the opportunity to gasp, "Tell me how to pleasure you, Master. I want to love you in all ways. I worship you--let me pay homage."

His words sent electric pulses zipping down Obi-Wan's spine. Wasting no time, Obi-Wan backed himself up against the nearest wall.

Then he placed his hands on Anakin's shoulders and pushed the young man gently to his knees. Anakin took the hint.

Kissing across his Master's lower abdomen, he nuzzled in the soft hair lazily spread on either side of his navel. Obi-Wan's scent was concentrated here due to his movement during the day and his clothing stimulating the sweat out of his skin. Anakin inhaled all he could until his lungs begged to release the carbon dioxide.

His thumbs rubbed against Obi-Wan's hips as he kissed. Slipping two fingers under the waistline of his pants, Anakin tugged slightly to settle the waistband lower and reveal more delicate skin. Applying his tongue now, he created a wet trail from just under Obi-Wan's sternum down to his pants. His eyes looked upward to catch Obi-Wan watching his every move. Anakin smiled against the lower belly and applied a quick kiss before continuing.

Obi-Wan smiled back.

Unfastening his Master's pants, Anakin extended the path with his tongue. The hair became more dense and coarse. But it smelled even better to the taller man. He leaned forward on his knees and bent his back as he moved south. Obi-Wan's pants were starting to dangle from his body, held up almost exclusively by Anakin's hands. And Anakin inched them excruciatingly slowly downward. Obi-Wan's hands played through the wayward curls in front of him, anticipating what was to come and yet enjoying each teasing movement.

The fabric catching on Obi-Wan's full erection as the pants dropped, Anakin used a hand to gently free him. He took a moment to admire and imprint this moment upon his memory. His gentle, warm breath against the sensitized crown caused Obi-Wan to shiver again. Finally, he spoke for the first time all evening.

"I love you, Anakin," he said softly, catching the young man's attention. They locked their gaze for a moment until Anakin's hand strayed to the underside of Obi-Wan's straining cock.

"I love you too, Obi-Wan," Anakin replied before Obi-Wan's head leaned back against the wall in ecstasy. Anakin attached his lips to the side of Obi-Wan's organ and mouthed his way up and down. When he encountered the pre-come already lubricating his Master's cock, Anakin licked it slowly. Then he slipped his mouth fully over the crown and foreskin and applied pressure. Obi-Wan tried hard not to drive forward with his hips, preferring Anakin choose his own pace.

The build-up of the past month was too much for Obi-Wan as he enjoyed Anakin's talents. He felt the pressure pooling in his groin before Anakin had passed more than a few times up and down his length. He indicated his state of tension to his lover by placing his hands on his shoulders and squeezing. Understanding his partner's meaning, Anakin kept his momentum and technique consistent.

Inhaling sharply, Obi-Wan felt himself unfolding in a myriad of ways. Somewhere in the middle of his orgasm he managed to reach out to Anakin through the Force, and his pleasure reverberated through both of them. Anakin didn't release his Master until Obi-Wan urged him to stand, needing the intimacy of kissing after his burst of gratification. He licked at Anakin's swollen lips and appreciated their girth in new ways.

"Are you pleasured, my Master?" Anakin asked in a whisper as he moved next to Obi-Wan's ear. He took the soft lobe into his mouth and tugged. He was practically supporting Obi-Wan's full weight with no small help from the wall. Obi-Wan's incoherent moaning was his reward.

"I want--" Obi-Wan gasped. He inhaled and exhaled. Looking straight into Anakin's eyes, he tried again. "I want to make love," he confessed breathily. Then he added in a growl, "I want to fuck you until you scream, Padawan."

It was Anakin's turn to shiver. "Yes, please," he replied as he swept his Master up into his arms and carried him to Obi-Wan's bedroom. He had already decided earlier in the day that he wanted to have sex in Obi-Wan's bed instead of his own. He wanted to be surrounded by his Master in all ways.

Setting Obi-Wan gently on his feet and balancing him as the older Jedi stepped out of his loose pants, Anakin shed his own shirt next. Then he lifted his arms behind his head as Obi-Wan began kissing down his chest, his hands preceding his lips. He detected the scent of soap and idly imagined that Anakin must have showered in anticipation of the evening. Obi-Wan almost wished he hadn't washed away his own scent so completely.

Well, Obi-Wan thought, I'll just to get him to work up a sweat. He nipped along the side of Anakin's chest with his lips, then brushed over the same spots with his beard. Anakin hummed in appreciation as he ran his hands along the backs of Obi-Wan's arms, gripping and releasing as the mood struck him.

Unlike Obi-Wan's silky hair, Anakin was as smooth as baby's skin. The older man attached himself to one of Anakin's dusky nipples as he unbuttoned his pants and slid them down the slim hips. He too had to assist in the escape of Anakin's erection.

Grasping the hard organ, Obi-Wan stroked him firmly. He knew from instinct that Anakin would appreciate more aggression in his stimulation although he kept his suckling gentle and light. He switched nipples and reached his free hand around to massage Anakin's ass cheek. The younger Jedi let out a sound that only encouraged Obi-Wan's ministrations. He sought out those full lips once again and upped the intensity and depth of their kissing.

Removing his hand from Anakin's ass only to grip his throbbing cock, the Master started to move them backward toward the bed. Turning so that Anakin's back was to the mattress, he pressed him down bodily. Then he climbed overtop the bronze god now gracing his bed and took his time looking at him. Kissing here and there, he surveyed the landscape he was about to explore. Then he settled his hips over Anakin's and leaned in to rub noses.

"Magnificent," he breathed into Anakin's mouth. He then proceeded to create friction between their bodies and slide their cocks along one another both now enveloped in Obi-Wan's strong hand. Anakin enveloped him in another bear hug with his strong arms, burying his nose in Obi-Wan's neck.

"I can't believe I almost lost this," Anakin said, pulling back to look Obi-Wan in the face and toy with his bangs falling over his green eyes. "I almost lost what I didn't know was the very thing I wanted most of all. Us."

Obi-Wan's eyes sparkled as he felt the heat radiating off of Anakin. "No, you didn't. You just had to work a little harder for the thrill of a lifetime." His sly smile turned into a laugh for both of them.

When they caught their breath again, Anakin said, "Fuck me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope!" This time he held the sly smile.

As Obi-Wan continued snuggling into his young man's neck, Anakin's straining erection was starting to become more insistent. He canted his hips up toward the smaller man, begging for relief. Obi-Wan looked up into cloudy blue eyes and chuckled.

"May I help you?" he teased.

"You said something about . . . screaming?" Anakin returned.

"So I did," Obi-Wan said and slapped Anakin's flank playfully while his other hand reached out to the bedside drawer and removed a small bottle of oil.

Coating a couple fingers, Obi-Wan settled onto his knees, hitching Anakin's thighs up over his own. Crouching there, he placed one hand on the flat planes of Anakin's lower belly. The slick fingers made their slippery way down Anakin's inner thigh to the cleft of his ass.

Lubricating the entire channel before circling the tight muscles that were his destination, he lightly tested the give. Anakin gasped at the first intrusion of a fingertip.

"Relax," Obi-Wan whispered. "Slow your breathing. Feel the calm of the Force."

And then, to help his lover, Obi-Wan entered a Force-induced state himself. He caressed Anakin's Force signature until he felt the younger man sigh with release. Not complete release yet, but enough to ease their path toward that end.

Obi-Wan pressed his finger forward, searching for the sweet spot that could have Anakin seeing stars. His free hand moved lower to grasp Anakin's seething erection and murmured encouragement. "We have all night. Let go now, and we can make love for a longer time. Come for me, my Anakin."

Obi-Wan's words and subsequent curl of fingers were Anakin's undoing. His back arched and drove him further into his Master's hand curved around his swollen cock. He choked out Obi-Wan's name and shot hot semen up his own torso. Obi-Wan's own pleasure was written all over his face as he leaned forward to lap at the fluid, finally finding a taste of Anakin not tainted by synthetic aromas.

Anakin came down from his high slowly and opened his eyes and arms at the same moment. He felt suddenly vulnerable and needed the reassuring and acutely sold presence of the man who had been his rock for over a decade. Obi-Wan slid into those arms as if he had always inhabited them. They rested together listening to their heartbeats and breathing.

"What made you change your mind?" Obi-Wan asked his burning question.

Anakin nuzzled into Obi-Wan's hair and replied, "I didn't change my mind--I listened to my heart." He paused to kiss along Obi-Wan's hairline to his jaw. "We're all adjusting to a different galaxy. Some of us are just slower to see our true paths. Thank you for waiting for me to catch up." He smiled into his lover's eyes.

Obi-Wan kissed him gently and said, "It was my pleasure."

"It will be," smirked Anakin, and kissed the tip of his Master's nose. Dropping his hand to Obi-Wan's rapidly stiffening cock, he said thickly, "I'm ready if you are."

Obi-Wan's growled response against Anakin's chest along with the tilt of his hips indicated all the readiness he felt. Shifting more fully on top of Anakin, he slid down to nestle between his legs.

The bottle of oil to hand again, he coated his manhood. That was when he noted a slight shake in his hands that betrayed his intense excitement and pent-up arousal. His emotions were a riot of tumultuous sensations as well. He couldn't help the rush of feeling that made him momentarily dizzy. He closed his eyes tightly and willed the spinning to cease.

Obi-Wan's pause caught Anakin's attention. "Are you all right?" he asked in concern. Then he gently cupped his partner's face in both hands and sought to understand the distress through their Force connection.

The bright white glare of Obi-Wan's signature took his breath away. He reached out to pull the light and heat to him and was further decimated by the power of Obi-Wan's feelings. How did he keep a lid on these enormous emotions, he wondered in awe. Never had he suspected the depth at which Obi-Wan felt, especially now that his love for Anakin had grown to almost consume him. Anakin felt new respect for Obi-Wan's self-control. Amazing, he thought. He really did know what I was going through all those turbulent years.

Obi-Wan reached for Anakin through the Force as well. He wanted to share everything about this moment. On the physical plane, he shifted his weight forward to place himself more fully against Anakin's entrance. The tip of his cock wept in joy. Increasing the pressure incrementally, he slid inside with a sudden give. The ring of muscle embraced him and allowed him entry. His mind spiraled. Anakin let out a keen of thin sound.

Keeping his pressure steady, the Master continued his journey. His hands held both of Anakin's hips, to steady them or to move them he wasn't sure. An eternity passed as he slid further and further into the other man's body. It felt endless to him until his body met Anakin's. They were fully joined. He released his lovers's hips and bent to kiss a trail up to sweaty pectorals. He hummed his approval of the scents and sights he found there.

Anakin contracted and relaxed his sphincter, enjoying the feeling of fullness. But he soon desired more--more movement. He began with his hips as best he could underneath Obi-Wan's body, encouraging the older man to join him with little mewls of pleasure every time Obi-Wan sank in completely.

Their pace matched and increased. They clawed at one another, desperate to feel like one body joined by the living Force. Their thrusting became a blessing and a curse as the joining necessitated the subsequent separation.

"Want you--oomph. Like this--uhhhhh. All ways. Always," Obi-Wan choked out against Anakin's neck.

"Master! Obi-Wan!" Anakin began chanting. Their undulating synced to his words until he stopped to gasp oxygen desperately. Then they began to truly pound against one another. The bed slammed against the wall, but no one paid heed. The galaxy had contracted to the radius of heat radiating from their sweaty bodies. They knew nothing but each other.

Climax came upon them suddenly, each howling in immense release. Obi-wan had struck Anakin's prostate over and over; and once his muscle contractions began exquisitely torturing the older man's buried cock, he too was transported. Their sweat and tears and semen mixed in a cocktail of baptismal fluid anointing their love and joining.

Their chests heaved against each other as their arms slackened their hold, exhausted and satiated. Minutes passed before Obi-Wan shifted slightly to slide from Anakin's body. His lips reached out to touch the nearest skin, mouthing the scented flesh. A lazy smile crossed his face.

"Wow," he sighed, twisting his head to look into Anakin's eyes. The same lazy smile met his gaze.

"Mmmmm," Anakin agreed and ruffled the silky tresses before him.


End file.
